Should I be angry?

From notalawyer0fraud0: Uhm so my friend jokingly said that she hurt herself and to get the heat off of her she pointed out my Sh…
I have kept her secrets
And she didn’t keep mine…
help what do I do???


It’s hard when a friend says something personal about you. It sounds like your friend was trying to have a joke about themselves but then crossed the line by disclosing something personal about you.

One thing maybe that could be helpful is having a conversation with your friend about those boundaries. I would encourage you to perhaps talk to someone if you’re struggling with self harm, but I also understand that small steps have to be taken and it can be a very personal and traumatising step to take.
I hope your friend has some grace to listen to your needs and to understand why disclosing those personal boundaries aren’t helpful to you


From twixremix: to have her joke about self harm when she knows you are going through that is heartbreaking. i’m sorry you had that interaction with her and i hope you can share with her how that was hurtful so she can hopefully learn and not do that again especially with something so personal to you. sending you comfort and love, my friend.

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From mystrose: I’m sorry that your friend didn’t keep your secret and I think having a talk would be a good idea. Let her know how it made you feel and talk about how you can prevent something like that from happening again. Trust between friends is pretty important. I hope you are getting some help for your self harm too and that you are taking care of yourself. You matter!


I’m so sorry you had this experience. It can be hurtful when a friend makes light of something serious that you’re struggling with.

It may be helpful to assert your boundaries with this friend and potentially explain to her how these kinds of jokes aren’t funny, especially given what you’ve been going through. Something that helps me personally is using “I” or “I feel” statements, such as “I feel hurt when you joke about self harm.” This way, instead of making an accusatory statement, you can focus more on your own feelings and how they’ve been impacted by her actions.

It’s worth noting that if this is something that she’s not receptive to, it may be worth reevaluating if this is a good friend to have. Please remember that you deserve to be surrounded by people who support you and take your issues seriously.

I hope I could help and please know that you’re not alone. Hold fast.

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Hey there.
I can understand maybe you felt a betrayed; but maybe they didn’t realize they stepped over that line. So, when things settle a bit between you guys maybe just let them know how you felt.
I suspect most of us have said things to others and maybe not realized how hurtful it was to that person. Hopefully you can work it out. I wish you the best.


Hey there friend :wave:t2:

Self-harm is no joke. Your friend is so wrong to make jokes about hurting herself and then to point out your scars. To put it simply, it’s hurtful and insensitive and there is no need for it

You need to tell her this. Tell her how you feel so that this never happens again. Explain that if she cannot be trustworthy towards you, there cannot be a friendship.

Hopefully you manage to rebuild the friendship :green_heart: