So much to deal with i dont know how

hi im a regular viewer on twitch and I have a lot of issues, my lifes story is that I was bulled from the age of 5 upto 18 for being an undiagnosed autistic person even though I was diagnosed at 16 it didn’t help much, the damage was already done I never got the chance to study in school or have any friends, when I was 13 I was playing football had my front tooth knocked clean out when I hit a wall with my head, I was out cold for 20 mins, now I have a false tooth,i also broke my knee when a bully pushed me down some stairs in primary school when I was 7,broke my arm when I was 19 in a motorbike accident, ive also had self harm issues since I was 16 and suicidal thoughts, currently I suffer with severe paranoia and schizophrenia hearing voices and stuff its scary :frowning:, I also have flashbacks to when I was abused sexually by my father at age 29, I still see him cos im strong but he will never admit what he did, hes 86 now so in 10 years he will be dead which will make me happy cos I hate him!, im always calling Samaritans and NHS 111 and other mental health orgs to try and help me, im on sertraline an anti depressant and im looking for some different anti psychotics atm.



Sounds like you’ve been through so much hard stuff that it’s hard to know what to do. You’ve had some truly horrible experiences that no one should ever have to deal with. And when you’ve been through all that, it has a massive effect on your day to day life in the present. It’s really hard to move forward or to know how to, especially when you struggle with all this scary stuff. That’s really rough.

Life must feel pretty overwhelming and scary right now. Must feel so difficult right now, I’m really sorry. I’m really glad you decided to reach out and share your story. I’m also glad you’re receiving professional help as well, and really hope you’re able to find some support that helps you, though I know it can feel like a very frustrating experience at times.

I know life must feel pretty impossible right now, but things can get better. The past and present don’t dictate the future. Recovery is possible, things can change. It might feel slow, it might not always feel like progress, but things can start to change and improve. Hold fast.

I want you to know that no matter how you feel right now, the truth is that you are loved and cared about. I’m super proud of you for making this far in life, surviving all the horrible things that have happened to you, and still being here to share you’re story. You’re awesome.

I hope you know that there are so many people who would love to support you and know you more. We’re here for you and care about you.

Hold fast, we believe in you.

With love and care,


First of all, thank you for sharing. I’m appalled you had to go through what you did growing up. You can absolutely cut someone out of your life regardless of how old they are. Especially after being sexually abused.
Here for you!
Sending love and prayers your way

Hi ravenholdtassassinx,

The HeartSupport Houston team responded to your topic. Click here to watch it.

Hold Fast friend, and lean on our community.

  • John and the HeartSupport Houston team

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