Some stuff recently

it’s been a while since i posted. i recently had a nightmare-ish kind of dream. it was me drowning in a lake with strangers looking at me. it wasn’t even my perspective too. i searched up what that means and it said " dreaming about drowning is mainly associated with the danger of being overwhelmed by emotions and responsibilities . and yes, i actually do agree with getting overwhlmed by responsibilities. i have so much going on, auditioning for my flute, homework, school ending, drama, summer vaction, all of that. i think a lot of people surrounding me except me to do something. it also says that i shouldn’t bottle up my feelings. i don’t know how to do that. i don’t know how to not bottle up my feelings.

also this one last thing, the number 338 keeps showing up in my life, it came up in one of my math quizzes, when i look at the clock it said 3:38, and there’s this person i really really want to become friends with because she seems chill. her track number was 338. so again, i wondered what that means and searched it up. In numerology, 338 breaks down to 3+3+8=14 and 1+4=5. Number 5 represents change, adaptability, and freedom. Therefore, the angel number 338 suggests that changes are about to come into your life, which can lead to personal growth and success . that’s what it said. i usually only believe in zodiac signs and stuff like that but i feel like angel numbers are interesting too. i’m actually surprised at myself for wanting to grow personally. i hope great changes come to my life. thanks for listening.

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Hi sometimes.emo,

Thank you for sharing. I’m sorry to hear you had that kind of dream. I have had a drowning dream before as well, so I know it can be a scary to wake up from. Sometimes those google dream searches can really come in handy to help us interpret and understand what might be going on in our psyche. After all dreams are based on our minds and our feelings, they are creations of our minds. From what you mentioned it definitely sounds like you have a lot to juggle on your plate right now. As a sidenote: I hope your flute audition goes well, or that it went well if you have already had it. I think that with everything you are juggling, you are doing and trying your best. Other people’s expectations can make the pressure feel heavier and more intense but regardless of their opinions, so long as you are doing your best then what you are doing is good enough.

As for bottling things up, if we aren’t used to expressing our emotions, or if whenever we do try to express our emotions people diminish them, then it can be really hard to let them out and express them with others. For myself, sometimes when I have emotions that I don’t feel ready to express with others, I write them down (journaling or creative writing), or I do kickboxing (which for me is a fun and active way to physically release my emotions). So not bottling up doesn’t necessarily mean talking to someone all the time. Although talking to someone could be helpful as well.

Despite everything you are facing, I am glad to see that you have a positive and open outlook and approach about the future. And that you are hopeful for great changes to come. This is an amazing start and mindset to have. And I am cheering for you as you encounter whatever is next to come! :white_heart:

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Hey hey sometimes.emo. Thanks so much for posting about this. Emotions can be a tough thing to wade through, especially if we arent taught how to not bottle things up - heartsupport — Mozilla Firefox - Some stuff recently - HeartSupport / Support - heartsupport — Mozilla Firefox - 30 May 2024 | Loom

i am so sick and tired of my life. nothing goes my way and there’s always some kind of negaitivity in my life everyday. today when i got home from school i think i had a similar feeling of a mental breakdown on my couch. i spent a whole hour on my phone just laying there. it felt really good because of how quiet and calming it was and i noticed how i am always on my phone to keep my mind away from things i don’t want to think. i don’t think i can live without my phone now since i am so glued to it. and i always always do my flute practice once i get home and get a it of rest but i ignored it. my mother was telling me to but i told her that i am tired. she thought i didn’t get enough sleep. once i get into the next grade, i have a thing going on with my flute and i have to turn in a piece of this high school level song soon. i really never wanted to do this but my band teacher advised me to do it and my parents said i should do it. I couldn’t say no so i practiced for a whole month. i realized just yesterday that i got one of my notes wrong for the whole thing and i just randomly gave up. i told my parents about it and they said i shouldn’t play my flute anymore if i just quit. i don’t know what to do and i have to turn in a recording of that piece on june 7th. i don’t know. i don’t want to quit my flute i’ve been playing for 4 years. but just because of that doesn’t mean i should do something i never wanted to do. the pressure is so hard, i can’t say no but i also can’t ask for help from anyone because i don’t want to know what they feel. i’ve always been like this, not being able to ask for help. i don’t know. and sorry if i misspelled something because i am in a rush. everything in my life is a mess.

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Hi @sometimes.emo,

I can relate to your post but I strive to be positive even life gets rough. Everyone can relate to your post. Life is always a mess. That’s cool you play a flute and I wish I can play an instrument. It’s okay to use your phone as a break from practicing playing a flute. It feels like a reward to me. If you hate playing the flute, you should play a different instrument that interests you. There are so many different types of instruments out there. Your band teacher and parents shouldn’t force to play an instrument that you hate. Sometimes adults will pressure me to do something but I always refuse. Your band teacher or parent will be mad at you. However, your happiness matters the most. I used to be a people pleaser but not anymore.