I am writing this because I am tired of crying and running around in a circle of confusion, but there is a teenager I know, online, who is suffering from dysphoria and talks about her struggle of getting out of bed, eating, or even feeling comfortable in “they” (her) body. This person recently went through a wall of bad news and is choosing to give up the life “they” have. I am not at a lost on what to do, because I do NOT want this person to die and I WANT to continue to supporting this person’s life from beginning to end so they do not feel alone in the dark. I feel like dysphoria is consuming this person into a deep depression. The last thing I want to hear or see is another young person committing suicide or feeling trapped in their own body. If anyone, anyone have valuable information or suggestion or can send help that would be great fort his person.
Hey friend. Thank you for looking out for this person and loving them through this.
It’s really hard when someone starts talking about suicide and you can’t seem to encourage them in any way - I’ve been on both sides of that conversation. I don’t think there’s much that you can do other than support this person through this and be there for t hem.
Do you know where this person lives? If you believe they’re in danger, the best thing you can do is phone up the police for a welfare check. If you and this person believes that depression is playing a part in this struggle, you can suggest HeartSupport’s depression workbook Dwarf Planet - you can buy it on amazon or get it free on the HS website. Try and encourage her to reach out to a therapist, HS has a partnership with BetterHelp that can get her 7 days free.
There are also a lot of online support groups for these things, so you can always look around for communities and groups online that target Dysphoria specifically. I mean, they can always come here too! The more support, the better.
I’m sorry I can’t be of much more help, but I hope you get something from that at least. You’re doing an awesome job at looking out for that person. Keep doing what you’re doing… Sometimes, persistent love from someone can really make a difference, it just takes time. It took more than 6 months of receiving unconditional love for me to really start seeing a turn around in my thinking and destructive behaviour. <3
Hold Fast
Kayla
Hi friend,
What a good friend you are to be there and care. I know how hard this can be. I was talking to a teenager some months ago who was very suicidal and depressed. They were constantly stressing and threatening their lives and it put me in a really tough situation because I couldn’t do anything for them after a point and they refused to listen to my advice. It was so hard. I finally had to reach out for help from others because it was starting to affect ME and my mental health.
The best thing you can do is suggest that they
- Reach out to a family member, school counselor or friend for help.
- Ask a guardian around them to help them set up a therapist. So they have a safe place.
- Connect and reach out to a suicide prevention hotline and allow them to help them through it and maybe find resources.
- Find a support group to join for people who struggle with similar things.
- And as Kayla mentioned, Heart Support has a guide and workbook for depression called DWARF PLANET and one as a guide and workbook through self harm called REWRITE. Both can be purchased on Amazon or found if you search the Heart Support shop where they will send it to you at no cost if you can’t buy it right now.
- As Kayla also mentioned, Heart Support is partnered with BetterHelp, an online counseling service. If you go to their streaming page twitch.tv/heartsupport there is a banner for BetterHelp there that you can click on and sign up for a 7 day FREE trial. If your friend is a teenager this may require help as it DOES require you to put in a credit card number. But it will NOT charge you if you cancel BEFORE the 7 days are up. Your 7 days will still be active till its supposed to expire after you cancel, it’ll just make it so that it doesn’t charge your card. They also have a financial aid system that you can sign up for and possibly use.
These are all things you can recommend and suggest, but friend, its up to this person to take these and use them. You cannot control this person and what they do and don’t do. I know we all want to help people but there is only so much we can do. It’s important that in your journey of helping people that you also look out for yourself. If it’s starting to affect your own mental health and your own well being, you may have to take a step back.If its someone online that is distant.
There have been a lot of people online who have turned to me and I am always willing to listen and be a friend. But I have had to open to people and let them know that if they aren’t willing to help themselves or take even small strides to getting better, that I can’ t be of much help. I can listen. I can be understanding. I can be compassionate and caring. But if people drag me through the same cycle over and over and refuse to listen or do anything to help themselves, then all that does is leave me in a bad place and drag me down too.
So be careful my friend. Know that it IS okay to put up boundries. It IS okay to step back if you need. It IS okay to look out for you. Do not feel guilty if things are not working out. You are not responsible for other people. All that matters is that you tried your best. You gave them options, you offered resources. They have to be willing to take advantage of those and use them
I hope that these things help your friend. I hope they find peace and healing. Thank you for being so caring and kind and helping someone in need. That makes a difference my friend. It really does.
- Kitty