Sorting out some thoughts// being open about how my menstral cycle affects me

Sometimes I think I share too much. Maybe I shouldn’t have been so open in the past year, maybe this maybe that. But at this point it’s just who I am.

I’m pretty open when I’m struggling now which I used to not be at all. Since eighth grade I held a lot in up until my senior year of high school.

My thoughts that are lies:

I’m just looking for pity: complete bs. I hate talking about my problems so why would that even be a reasonable thought for me.

I’m never going to make it: complete bs. I’ve worked my ass off this past year and I have dragged my ass through hell and back the past three years of my life and shit I’m proud of myself. I’ve made it this far and I can make it even farther.

Sometimes I still hate myself yeah, but it’s a rare occurrence. Sometimes I still want to resort to self injury yeah, but it’s a rare occurrence.

IF TALKING ABOUT PERIODS GROSSES YOU OUT THEN STOP READING HERE. WARNING.

Something I’ve known for a long time but am embarrassed to talk about it how my menstral cycle plays a big part in my depression. People think oh it’s jusg that time of the month, all women go through it, but heck that’s not how it works for me.

My time of the month takes up like two weeks of the four weeks in a month- so there’s two good weeks where hormones are all straight and fine, and then I get chucked back into the cycle and a week is feeling cramps and being hormonal and frustrated and depressed and crying for no reason, and then we finally hit the menstral cycle week- shark week- and then there’s all the precious plus the added pain and honestly the annoying as frick blood.

I get affected very much by certain people. I get confused as to if me and certain people are actually friends and I take it out on people. I “need a break from the community” but in all actuality it’s just my cycle.

But in that period of two weeks, I think wow I must be over reacting, or why can’t I be as strong as my sister and mom and just not show that I’m so affected by my menstral cycle.

I get easily ticked off, easily angered, and I actually care when people like me more than a friend. I get lost in dating apps when I know that once this two weeks is over with I’m not going to have any interest at all.

So today I’m sitting in bed depressed because I don’t want to get out of bed because of the way my menstral cycle messes me up.

Yes. I am going to talk to my doctor about this now that I know it is something many other women deal with.

If you’re a woman and struggling with this too then you aren’t alone and these thoughts and emotions and feelings ARE OKAY. It’s not dramatic or overreacting.

It’s just another thing to work through and try and get better with.

End rant; you are not alone if you struggle with these issues as well.

Thanks for reading.

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Oh girl. Same. Like literally me mines longer then normal as well and it just messes everything up 100%. My emotions are ten times worse and I’m super sensitive. You’re not alone and I love you.

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Hey! I hope everything works out for you!

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