Hi there. I have stage IV cancer and am having a rough time. Chemo is keeping me alive for now, but Stage IV means terminal. I’m hoping treatment might keep me alive another 2-3 years. I can’t talk with people close to me about my feelings because they are too close, they end up crying and then I end up consoling them. I was in therapy but even my therapist would start tearing up sometimes. How do I live out my remaining days? How much should I let my family know when I am suffering? How can I protect my 18 year old from the emotional fallout? Or is that even something to be concerned about?
Hugs and love being sent out to you @Fergs
If it is possible to do so, talk with someone else who is going through what you are going through. Maybe a video call could even be set up. Though intimidating, talking out something as serious and terrifying as this with another person who is exactly aware of how you feel can work wonders.
I wish I could offer more, but regardless, I send you my sincerest love and reminder that you are never alone in all you do and live through. You are a treasured soul
it’s tough time of course but non of us can really feel or even think about what you are going through and for the people who love you is very hard to see you suffering but it doesn’t mean that you should keep it inside and i hope the treatments would work for you not for 2-3 more years but for the rest of your life.
history is full of people with diagnosis that you got this much time and remained longer that made every one suprised and thousends of people who fought with cancer and beaten that …
don’t just give up as i said we can not even imagine what you are going through but that’s all i can tell you just don’t give up and whenever you needed to talk we are here
wish you the best
Thank you all for the replies. Talking to other cancer patients would help. All the in person cancer support group activities are shut down right now because of course we are so vulnerable to COVID-19. In the past these things were really a big help. I guess it’s time to look for online versions. You know how it can get when you’re depressed. Even small tasks can seem overwhelming. So stupid as it sounds, finding these online groups can feel like a big task on my most depressed days. I can use a not so depressed, more clear headed time to search for this stuff.
I can somewhat understand what you are going through, my mentor for the past four years has recently died due to cancer as well. A rough time has happened to everyone who he has affected, a large number, and it is still fresh in many of our minds.
But, even though he knew he would be passing soon, he spent every minute he could reaching others what he loved and trying to find ways to make everyone’s days happier. Even when he was hurting, he only let his mask drop in front of me twice.
Afterwards he always said, “If I can leave something behind in the minds and hearts of people around me, nothing is lost.” I know that you have something that is dear to you, spend this time you are gifted to enjoy the moments that you can spend with loved ones and doing the things you love.
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