Stressful last week

Last week was really stressful for me, i starting struggling agaij with self-harm i’ve been trying to stop the addiction again but it’s been hard when i’ve been struggling with thoughts and then losing a friend to suic*de, ive been losing sleep bc i’m scared my friend will all attempt again

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That sounds like a whole lot going on, and all in one week! I’m sorry you have to carry all of that.

It’s definitely hard to stop doing the thing you always ran to when things get hard. That totally makes sense. Have you been able to talk to anyone in your life about the week you’ve had and your concerns for your friend?

Stopping any addiction, like self harm, takes so much time and really hard work. Did you know HeartSupport has resources to help you walk through that? If you’re up to it, I mean. It’s a book called Rewrite and we have posts here on the wall about it, too!

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Hey @Horselover200246,

This is a lot to deal with. It makes sense to try to cope in a way you’ve used before while trying to manage the fear that your friend might hurt themselves. On one hand, it is admirable and truly beautiful that you care that way. Your friends are very lucky to have you in their life. On the other hand, your needs matter too, and it sounds that having some time to focus on yourself could be a good thing. I know that it’s hard to not feel guilty for being our own priority when we know that people we love are struggling. However, we can’t do anything good for them if we’re not taking care of ourselves either. Not saying that you don’t of course. But the relapse, the lack of sleep as well - these are red flags to consider and listen to right now. You deserve to rest and focus on you for the time that would be needed.

I totally second @Jezliee about the HS Resources. Rewrite is a really good way to start and eventually involve your therapist or loved ones in your own recovery. We, here, can also support you. There are members who have read the book and used it as a crutch when they needed it. Conversations about each chapter, the steps you’d take and the obstacles you might encounter can happen here on the Wall. All in all, you don’t have to be alone in that fight. And you can make sure to involve people like here who wouldn’t be necessarily struggling, but would be in a position to really support and encourage you.

As for the situation with your friend, is someone involved in the situation? An adult? A doctor/counselor? If you are alone with this, if you are their confident, then you might need to try to involve a third party in times to come. If you feel overwhelmed by the situation, please don’t hesitate to involve someone else who is not struggling and can handle those things without being affected. That wouldn’t make you a bad friend or a bad person. We all have our limits, and these situations are objectively heavy. It’s important to make sure that it remains safe for everyone, including you.

Sending love your way. You matter, friend. Your mental health matters. Please take care of yourself. :hrtlegolove:

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Hi Horselover200246
Wow you are going through a lot right now. The suicide of your friend must be very hard on you and it is taking its tole on your mental health. It is understandable that you are starting to have problems with self harm again. You are in a tough spot. But even in a time like this there is hope. You are hurting but the pain is not going to last forever. Be kind to yourself you dont deserve to suffer like that. Give youself some space and, most importantly, forgive youself for whatever it may be you are punishing yourself for. :slightly_smiling_face:

Are you currently seeing a therapist of some kind? I think it might be a very good thing to do. They might help you go through such hard times. The might also help you find ways to battle your addiction to self harm. I am going to post a video here where you can find some ways how to battle self harm. I hope it helps at least a little. :upside_down_face:Self-Harm and Self-Care: Tips on How To Cope - YouTube

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My friend is doing better now, she’s been letting me take time for myself now

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I am not seeing a therapist right now because my parents won’t let me get one

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