Struggling with Faith/Death

I am honestly just wanting to get some insight about something because I have been struggling with this for a while. I would like to know what people believe as far as what happens after you die? It can be a religious opinion, or any general opinion.
Two years ago, I lost an ex boyfriend to suicide. I saw him struggle with depression for a few years, and although I encouraged him to talk to his doctor, he refused to do anything about it. I saw him lose himself, and although I am so terribly sad that he decided to chose that route, I know he was hurting. I can imagine it is just so exhausting to hurt that badly and it not go away.

Ever since he passed, I’ve been struggling with Faith, religion, as well as just common sense about death. I want to believe that he is somewhere better, peaceful and no longer hurting. I want to believe that heaven exists, or a place similar to. I want to believe that we aren’t just… gone. But I don’t know.

I know that no one truly knows. You won’t know until you aren’t here, and then you won’t be here to tell anyone. I just wanted to know your opinion on it, your thoughts, your beliefs, to try to help me try to understand or try to form an opinion.
I think about it so much. I don’t know who to talk to about it without getting a bias answer due to them being religious or believing in science.
Any input would help me. I’ve felt stuck about this for a while. At least the people that have strong opinions about it or strong faith, they are at peace with believing that their loved ones go somewhere, or don’t. I’m so conflicted that it just makes it hard to think about.

Thanks friends.

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@larynjoy Hey, I hope you don’t mind but I sent you a long, long message.

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