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Stuck and in a rut I can’t get out of


#1

So I’m in a really dark place mentally and emotionally. Everything seems to go to shit when I put my hand on it. The girl I was talking to is now socially exhausted and has been for the past month. This happened after I opened up to her about some shit in my life. Then my friend who I’ve talked about here before always comes to me for advice. I give it to him but if I say I wouldn’t do this or that he does it anyways making me wonder why I give people advice. To put that in context I’m like a shrink for all my friends and I only have therapy once a week for me to work out my shit, therefore I get bogged down with everything from everyone who comes to me. I started self harming last night to feel better but that didn’t even help. I just feel trapped. I started to talk to this girl online, but I feel like I could potentially throw away what was meant to be with the girl who doesn’t wanna hang out but at almost 30, I wanna settle down and everything. I just don’t know what to do anymore.


#2

It’s so easy to get lost in a circle of giving to people all of the time but then not receiving the care we need for ourselves. It’s wonderful to be there for those we love and care about but do not exhaust yourself! If you need to take a moment to step back, recoup and breathe in some fresh air. Do it. We can’t truly help others if we are not taking care of ourselves. So do what you can but then take a step back for a little bit.

I had to start seeing my counselor every week because once every other week just wasn’t enough for me. And that hour goes by really fast! So if you feel you need to up how often you see your therapist please let them know so that they can work with you! There are also online counselors that maybe you could try out if your counselor is unavailable to fill you in more than you are now. There is of course here at Heart Support. I don’t know if you attend church and if there are any groups you can join. Any of these things can be refreshing.

But it’s also super important to make time for yourself to do what you love. Read. Write. Art. Sing. Game. Go out with a healthy friend. Make sure your making time for yourself so that you can refuel your energy!

You are important my friend. You are valued. Please be gentle with yourself and know that we care :purple_heart:


#3

Off topic a bit, new here, sort of, having issues posting. I got it to save but how to you officially post something?


#4

I will send you a private message and try to help you there instead of in this thread


#5

Thank you for the reply. I need to remember to take time for me and that’s something I’m not good at. I’m like a yes man to everyone and it wears me out. I’m hopeful that I can do online therapy as well as my normal one because once a week is starting to be not enough, though once I learn to take time for myself it might get better.


#6

You’re welcome my friend! And I hope that you can find some online resources that work for you. The heart support stream has a link to some online therapy. It’s a trial. Maybe you could try that out.

But yes. Take some time for you. Meditate! Yogi! Work out! Do hobbies that you love and enjoy. Anything that will make you feel better and promote a happier and healthier you. :purple_heart: Hold fast!