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Stuck in a life I don't want

I was forced into a career I don’t want but have to do because I am not rich enough to make my dreams come true. I was able to get by for the past 7 years but I can’t do it anymore. I feel stuck. I spend my days doing nothing even when I have a lot of pending work. I can’t afford counselling and I don’t know how to get out of this slump. Can someone give me tips to manage my studies and not procrastinate?

Thanks

Hi @Abby_m,

It’s really difficult to have to force yourself to do something you don’t like. Many people are not doing the job they want, most of the time due to financial reasons or external pressures. I’m sorry you feel like you didn’t have a choice, and I’m sorry you feel stuck in this situation. Procrastination is quite normal in such circumstances, so I hope you don’t feel guilty about it. You already spent 7 years doing this and you’re really strong.

Concerning your studies, maybe you can try to ask yourself if there are things you can still appreciate in it. I don’t know in which field you’re working, but maybe there are some aspects in it that you enjoy or you find more interesting. If you can, try to make your own researches and nourrish your own curiosity as much as you can. When I got something that was bothering me during my studies, I tried to look after the subject through readings, videos, online articles… Also, if you feel overwhelmed by a pile of things to do, you can try to list them and you can detail them in diferent subtasks. It can help to makes things easier to do, and sometimes the first step is the most difficult. Finally, if you can, try to work with friends or colleagues and have fun doing it! It can be difficult to keep motivation when we do things all by ourselves but others can be of a great support.

Also, even if we spend a lot of time at work or in a specific career, we can still build some healthy habits for ourselves. Like having little breaks during the day, going outside to get some fresh air, sleeping enough or doing something relaxing at the end of the day. You can still try to spend your free time to enjoy different activities. It’s important to have moments dedicated to something totally different. And if it helps you to feel great, then you never waste your time. Some hobbies doesn’t necessarily need to spend money, like exercising, walking, drawing, watching series/movies online, crafting things with natural or second-hand stuff (…). (Just some random ideas). Spending some time in nature can be really helpful too. But more generally, knowing that you can do something else, something different than your studies, can help you to reduce that feeling of being stuck.

Hold fast. :heart:

Hey @Abby_m,

I think the best way to manage your studies and work on procrastination is to try to find someway to enjoy what you are doing. One thing I have found very helpful is to study outside. I love being outdoors so I will go to a park and study there or I will just sit outside my house. You could also try different methods to studying. Something fun that I like to do is to use different colors when studying. I will highlight and write things in different colors to help me remember them better. As far as procrastinating goes, set up a schedule for yourself and try to find ways to “reward” yourself after you study or do some of your work. The most important thing is to find a way to enjoy what you are doing.

i found it helpful to have a calendar that measured the days and hours for each due date. i also found it helpful to read out loud. its hard to concentrate when you are depressed. you could try eating a healthy diet. and a bit of exercise. i used to walk to school. as for the due dates for assignments…i just did the best i could. sometimes it WAS the night before…and sometimes i spent time on them. and somethings things just sucked and everything went to shit…but i persevered, did the best and most work i could (and not every day was all that productive). and I had a study buddy. that’s a person in the class that you share phone numbers with and the two of you then help each other out for missed classes and for motivation. that really helped. and believe it or not…talking to my instructors about meeting the class expectations was very helpful as well. those are what worked for me and I got straight A’s.

Thank you for your kind word. I am so grateful:heart:

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Thank you for your help. I do find it easy to study in the library. I will try that more regularly.

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Thank you for advice. I did find a study partner for one of the subjects that I have the most problem with, so I hope it works out.

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