Back to heartsupport

Suffocatingly Lonely


#1

I am so tired of not having anyone in my life. I am so lonely all the time. I have tried everything that I can think of to meet people and make friends - volunteering, getting involved in things ect. - but no one seems interested in being a part of my life.

I was never overly great at making friends but in school I always managed to have a couple. But now I feel like it was just because they were stuck with me for a large par of the day. Now that I am done school and people aren’t forced to be with me, no one seems to care or to be bothered.

I try, I really do try. I push myself out of my comfort zone and being an introvert ect. But no one seems to care. The only times people seems to care if when they are using me for their own gain.

How do you all make friends? I am so sick of being stuck here and being so suffocatingly lonely.


#2

I agree making friends is hard. Especially when you’re weeding out the fake friends from the real friends.

Unfortunately to obtain these real friends you have to go through the process of actually getting to know these people. You know you’re friends when they open something up about themselves that they don’t usually share with people.

If you ever thought “well this is onesided,” like for instance that you’re the only one revealing certain things about yourself. That means there was never a friendship. They’re not your friend.

Now I could be wrong. Yet if it seems like you’re the only one sharing your “issues” or information about yourself. If you make clear you want to hang out with them and they never seem to be there unless they have their own “issues”.

That is not a friendship.

I can pretty much sum up that I’ve only one real IRL friend (I am not sure, but compared to the others.) There are over 300 people I know. There are 20 that might know things about me. There are 10 that know enough about me that could claim they’re actually my friend. Out of all these people I know IRL only 1 person is someone I confine in and I hangout with.

(The only other person I confine in is my therapist.)

Everyone that I’ve met is either from a hobby/interest. A club, library or through human services. So just going out and about daily life and telling people “hey, I am so & so. I am here,” is the right way. You’re doing nothing wrong.

#bethelight? (It is a concept I borrowed from a person that is wonderful. She says,)

It’s the idea that when we feel like no one can give us the support and care we need, we give that love and light out to others. We set an example of how people should be treated. Treat others how you wish you were treated when you were in a crisis. Be the light in someone else’s darkness.