Well, here I am again, talking about suicide. I just want it so bad. To just get this hell all over with, I want that more than anything. I always try to tell myself that I want to live for certain things, but anything I enjoy doesn’t matter. When everything thing is just so terrible, living for anything just seems like hell. “What’s the point in living for something if you’ll just be miserable?“, I find myself thinking. I keep finding myself thinking this, and I realize there is none. There’s no point in putting myself though this nightmare. It would be better to end my life in peace then to live in constant pain. This nightmare would finally be over. I’d be free. And I grow more confused every time I hear someone say it’s worth it to end it. Because every time I hear it sounds more wrong. I’m finding more and more that there is nothing wrong with ending my life. That all this time, I’ve been putting myself through this for other people’s sake. And I can’t life live for anyone or anything.
I guess my point is, everything is telling me it would be better to end my life. That I have no obligation to be here. That there’s no reason for me to suffer any longer. And I think I might be doing it soon. I don’t know when I’ll have the time alone to do it. It could be today, tomorrow, or any time really. And when that time comes, I think it’ll be time for me to move on from this world, and end this hellish nightmare once and for all.
I’ve tried to be supportive of everyone here, and I’m sorry if seeing something like this lets you down.