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Belongs to: Therapist Cry's While Listening to Wings of Maria Pt 1 and 2 by Tool
Taylor I hope this comment reaches you. My grandmother is dying of cancer, it’s in the final stage and her days are numbered. Seeing you break really caught me off guard since your videos always brighten up my day, especially as a lifelong Metalhead watching your journey through all different genres of Metal and Rock and watching you react and dissect all the songs. These two songs always hit hard but never as hard as they do now especially now that I’m dead broke and can barely make my ends meet to keep her comfortable as long as I can. Her dementia has also been rearing it’s ugly face and she’s slowly forgetting who I am, she’s the one who raised me since I never had parents, my physically abusive mother who used me as her punching bag and my deadbeat alcoholic father gave divorced when I was 6 and has picked up with extreme emotional abuse where she left off. I suffer from bipolar disorder, PTSD, PCS (post-concussion syndrome), extreme anxiety and insomnia. I’m on 9 medications a day to keep me somewhat “normal”, benzos, antidepressants, mood stabilizer, stimulants and sleeping pills. On top of all of that I’m a recovering heroin addict and alcoholic and this September I’m marking my 5th year of sobriety but I’m faltering and getting closer to slipping back in this hopeless situation. Except for few people I consider my brothers (since I’m the only child) I have no one left, no friends and 13 failed relationships out of which 3 were engagements, and as a psychologist myself once I’d outlive my usefulness I’d get cheated on and left in the dust each damn time. I simply cannot afford to trust anyone. With all that out of the way I’d really love for you to react to “Excess Baggage” by Staind which is such a hidden gem that majority is unaware of, it truly describes how me and those like me feel, I’ve actually uploaded a cover of it few days ago if you’re willing to check it out in your own time. Thank you for everything you do and keep on giving people hope
Thank you so much for your poignant honesty and for sharing your story. I am so sorry to hear that life has seemingly been beating you down repeatedly. That feeling of taking one punch after another- all in a fight that you didn’t know you entered- is brutal and can leave you feeling burnt out and sick of the fight.
But one thing that shines clearly through your story is that you ARE a fighter. You may not have signed up for this hardship, but every day you are suiting up and coming out of the other side victorious. You are still alive and kicking because each day you wake up and face life with dedication to overcome your circumstances. No matter what trauma you have experienced, or what addiction you have struggled with, or who has hurt you in the past, you face life every day ready to go into battle- and that needs to be CELEBRATED! So many people in your shoes would give up and let death take them, but you are unique. You are the one and only version of you and you know that you are worth fighting for- every day.
You know yourself well and you know how to block yourself from those sneaky hooks that life throws your way. You may get knocked down, but every single day you stand victorious as the bell rings knowing that you were not broken. You were not beaten. Your life is worth the fight and you will keep fighting daily to stay here.
You matter. Though your grandmother may be slipping, your presence to her is so incredibly selfless and loving. You can’t know how much you caring for her matters.
Keep on fighting. Keep on persevering. You are greater than your struggles. You are greater than your stumbles. You won’t be taken down by bad circumstances. If you ever want to open up more, please feel free to reach out to us. We are always here for you and would love to talk more. You are so loved.
Thank you so much for sharing your story and for being here. You are a very strong person as is evident by your 5 years of sobriety! That’s an amazing accomplishment. I’m sure it’s very difficult to hold on to as you deal with your grandmother’s failing health but YOU ARE STRONG and the sobriety you fought so hard for is worth holding on to. I’m sorry you are dealing with so much right now. When everything seems to hit all at once the world can feel as though it’s closing in on us and we’re about to drown. Like if one more thing happens it will break us. But sometimes that’s when we discover the strength within us or the light that’s just waiting for us to grab hold of. You are not alone and we care about you and what you’re going through. I pray that you find strength to hold on as you continue to care for your grandmother. It’s never easy to watch a loved one struggle. When my grandmother , who was also like a mom to me, was dying I struggled as well. Taking it one moment at a time made it bearable as I tried to focus on the blessing she was throughout my life, being there for her fully as long as I could. I’m praying for you and rooting for you! You are not alone!
@@HeartSupport I never thought you’d actually see this… I’m in tears honestly… Thank you so much for taking the time out of your day to reply it means the world to me! Today I got notification that you reacted to “The Patient” and immediately watched it, again thank you for yet another great video. I try my best, I have a discord server of my own for 4 years now and we’ve grown up to 800+ members which always makes me happy, it’s a Metal community server but also heavily focused on mental health too. Funnily enough was one step away from getting my PHD and becoming a phycologist but I’ve dropped out as heroin slowly entered my life. I’ve never stopped practicing and teaching myself on a daily basis though, especially in the fields of analytic psychology and medical psychology and working every day with people who struggle mentally, with addiction problems or both. And seeing a 90% success rate and more fills my heart with joy knowing that what I do the best (and for free) has saved lives. At least I know there’ll be lots of grateful mofos at my funeral lmfao
Thank you again so much for your kind words and support, I don’t have any money to donate but if you can please react to “Excess Baggage” by Staind, it’s an underrated gem that not many are aware of and it perfectly embodies this pain of loneliness and addiction that so many of us carry, I know you’ll love it. One love from Serbia
