The Dysfunctional Messed Up Family I Have

Dear Halmuni,
The most fucked up person who knows how to hide it well to the public. The one who lies over and over for her son and made him seem like the victim. The one who knows
that both of her son’s have done me wrong. I did not react in the appropriate manner, this I know. But for you to be able to sit in a court room, and lie up a storm and protect
your son in the process. Making it seem like I am the one always causing the problems. I know you know, deep down that you are doing me very wrong. Remember that visit in jail?
You looked me in the eyes and told me it’s all your fault. Yes, that whole situation was your fault. And to the courts/public; I am the one who was in the wrong.
The truth will always come out, eventually. Whether you like it or not. You can’t hide the true someone forever.
The guy who steals from me, the mom who gives her son full advantage of everything. Steals her grandson’s clothes and gives it to her son (Has been going on since 5th grade). The one who tries to make her Son look innocent to the public.
The one that KNOWINGLY buys/grows him drugs but won’t talk about why? The one who saves his crack pipe for him and will give it back to him. Yet, you want to take my bongs and
yell at me like you wish you were yelling at your son (tommy). Why on Earth would you EVER buy someone a wife especially this moronic individual. This guy can’t even do 3*3 and that’s
a fucking fact. You drug him up, then expect your grandson to deal with his bullshit. Remember when you would make me wake him up at midnight and make him breakfast? When the fuck
has my “dad” ever woke me up for school or made me breakfast before school? Why are you trying to make me have a good relationship with this guy who is committing fraud on you;
the entire family. It is a GIANT joke. You sit there and act like everything is O.K? Why not do the right thing for once and sit down and FORCE him to have a family talk?
Is that too much to fucking ask for? Oh wait I forgot, you can’t get him to sit down because you BUY HIM HIS DRUGS EVERY FUCKING DAY AND EXPECT HIM TO CHANGE.
The one who thinks she is providing a good life for everyone. Destroyed my life and corrupted my mental being. If the public knew, what my family has done wrong to me.
How they mess with my head all the time. You would understand why I play those mental games with them. I know it’s not smart for me to be doing that. But they have done me very wrong my entire life.
I want the public to know, that the Ock family living in Laguna Niguel is completely fucked up dysfunctional. My grandfather is the only sane one and he still has some
narcisissitic tendencies. My Grandma raised a bunch of terrible people, because her herself does not have good enough morals. She is very good at hiding things and problems.
She knows how to manipulate; This is where my father learned it from. I’m sick and tired of this bullshit. Nobody wants to sit and talk with me. They always try to tell me some
bullshit. They accuse me for doing meth like my Father. HEY DUMBASSES “THE TWO TIMES I BOUGHT METH WAS BECAUSE YOU GUYS PISSED ME OFF SO BAD I WANTED TO PROVE A POINT. I WANTED YOU
TO GET JUST AS UPSET AS ME. I DIDNT DO METH TO ENJOY IT. I DID IT TO FUCK MY LIFE UP SO YOU WOULD UNDERSTAND.” YOU DUMB FUCKING IDIOTS; I HAD A PROBLEM WITH XANAX FOR YEARS; COCAINE FOR A FEW MONTHS.
BUT INSTEAD OF TREATING ME LIKE MY FATHER. YOU BURN EVERYTHING DOWN FOR ME. WHY DO YOU THINK I WAS SO SUICIDAL FOR A WHILE? ONE CAN ONLY TAKE SO MUCH BULLSHIT, CONFUSION, CORRUPTION.
WHAT HAPPENED WAS I GREW UP AND REALIZED EVERYTHING GOING ON. THAT IS WHAT MADE ME NUTS.

“He’s just high”

Remember the last and final time we ate together at All That Korean BBQ in Irvine. Where did my “Dad” go middle of the meal? OH YEAH? TO PICKUP SOME FUCKING METH.
GOOD JOB KEEPING HIS GIRLFRIEND AROUND. ITS A LITTLE BETTER ON YOUR POCKETS RIGHT? SHE BUYS HIM ENOUGH DRUGS RIGHT?
Don’t forget to try and cover this one up too right? Something like, “He had an important phone call” Or “He had to go somewhere important” Type bullshit.
YOU KNOW THE FUCKING TRUTH. WE WERE IN IRVINE, NEXT TO HIS FRIENDS HOUSE. HE WENT TO GET FUCKING METH. HE CAN’T EVEN SIT STILL OR FOCUS HIS EYES FOR ONE SECOND.
BUT YOU KEEP BUYING HIM MORE DRUGS AND KILLING HIM AND RUINING MY MENTAL BEING TOO. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR EVERYTHING.
I WOULD HAVE RATHER LIVED WITH MY MOM AND GONE THROUGH TOUGH TIMES THEN HAVE TO BE A PART OF THIS MESS AND FEEL GUILTY FOR RANDOM SHIT WHEN I KNOW AND HAVE TALKED TO MY THERAPIST ABOUT IT
THAT I AM NOT IN THE WRONG. YOU JUST CONVINCED ME. YOU AND MY FATHER ARE ONE. THAT IS HOW I VIEW YOU.

I UNDERSTAND WHY SANDY KOMO LEFT; AND I RESPECT HER THE MOST.
YOU GUYS FUCKED WITH RICHARD SAMCHUNS MIND TOO. THAT IS WHY HE IS THE WAY HE IS. I DONT BLAME HIM AND IM PROUD OF HIM FOR EVEN BEING WHERE HE IS AT TODAY. LILLY IS JUST LIKE HALMUNI. SHADY, EVIL, MANIPULATIVE, AND GOOD AT FAKING IT.

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End of rant.

Had to type this up after my Father who is insanely high out of his mind right now tried to start problems with me again but for some odd reason, his mom just tells me : “don’t start anything.
You worry about yourself, you stay calm.” I am not going to sit here and watch my dad high off his ass come talk down to me and threaten me with bullshit. Why don’t you tell him to stop being high and if he is high to not talk to me. IS THAT NOT MORE LOGICAL? INSTEAD OF TRYING TO ACT LIKE ITS MY FAULT THAT I REACT WHEN HE CALLS ME A RETARD, OR OTHER SHIT. AND THREATENS ME WITH JAIL TIME BECAUSE YOU GUYS GAVE HIM THE POWER OF THAT. YOU WANTED ME TO STOP CALLING THE POLICE WHEN CONFLICTS AROSE BUT NOW IT FUCKS WITH MY MENTAL EVEN MORE.

I AM SO GLAD TO BE MOVING ON. I AM SO THANKFUL FOR WELFARE HEALTH CARE.
IT IS FINALLY TIME TO PROGRESS. EVEN AFTER JUST 1 DAY AT A CRISIS HOME I FELT BACK ALIVE. ALL I NEEDED WAS A FRIEND THAT UNDERSTOOD ME. THANK YOU GOD, FOR OPENING DOORS FOR ME. GIVING ME TENSION SO THAT I MAY GROW.
IT IS FINALLY TIME TO GROW.

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@godsgrace

Hey friend, thank you for sharing this open letter with us. I remember what you shared on a previous post.

You’ve been through a lot and you grew up too fast. It shouldn’t have been like this and your anger is totally understandable. I hope this will lead you progressively to find some peace.

I’m glad to hear about the therapist and health care. Every help could be welcomed when we face such difficulties. You’ll grow from all of this friend. 100%. This community is here for you as well, anytime.

Hang in there. :heart:

Wow. That’s all I can say. I can’t even begin to understand how people could be so cruel. I want you to know you deserve so much more than you are getting and it rips me apart. I wish I could make it all better, I truly do. Nobody, NOBODY, deserves to experience such trauma. Please hold strong. Please don’t give up. Drugs won’t solve anything, as I’m sure you’ve discovered. You are a warrior. You are strong! Nobody gets to define your happiness other than yourself. Please don’t give anyone the power to define how happy you are. PLEASE. I will pray for you.