The Fear is What I Keep Alive

Hello once again. It is good to be here. I’m not sure if anyone noticed that I tell anyone in this forum that being afraid is okay, and they can overcome it. To tell you the truth, I’m a hypocrite for saying it. I dealt fear with all of my life. Whether it is getting rejected by women, the ones I know would stop being friends with me, my family stops loving me, God doesn’t want me, changing, seeing a mental health specialist, letting go my pride, getting hurt, being in the worst season of my life, or end up dead. I have not overcome those fears. Why would I tell someone to face their fears if I can’t face mine? Sometimes I wonder if that’s where Depression and Acedia comes from? Maybe it doesn’t. I still don’t know right now. You can help me if it is true or not. I don’t want to be afraid anymore. Sometimes I wish I can be like the courageous people who are brave to do things what they want without worrying. I take my worries to the extreme. It could be the reason why I made mistakes. I know it takes time to do so, but I want to get it over with it. Fear has been pulling me back for a long time. It is time for me to fight back. What fears you have or haven’t overcome? Share your experiences, your advices, and what can I do to get better? I hope everyone is having a great week. Thank you for reading this. God bless. Stay strong.

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(This is answered with my HS Support Wall Team)
“Everyone here is a hypocrite. Human’s suck at taking their own advice, that is exactly why therapists often have a therapist. The best way to overcome fear is to tackle it in pieces. If you’re scared of driving maybe sit in the passenger seat. If you’re comfortable doing that maybe sit behind the wheel in an empty big parking lot, then maybe drive around a bit. I promise it’ll get easier. Practice makes progress. It’s ok to have a step backwards, you matter”

  • Ethan/SHTD

“There was a time in which I didn’t leave the house, I didn’t go to school, I didn’t live. The satisfaction of pushing your limits and succeeding in that is worth it in itself. If you’re not pushing yourself then you’re not growing in that way. The higher the risk the higher you grow. After you push yourself you realize there is so much more you can do.”

  • Batmanda/Mandie.

On the brightside (Ethan, Mandie, JoeJoe)

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IT is good to be afraid. Fear makes you aware. Awareness keeps you cautious and cautious makes you think. Yet letting those fears overwhelm you isn’t good. If you’re pressing forward even though you’re afraid then you’re no hypocrite. I fear everyday. I press on even though I’m afraid. I know if I stop then my fears win. I feel at times so uncertain and want to shut down. I argue with myself all the time and decisions are very difficult to me.

People will tell you how I’m a leader and that I’m dependable. (IRL) Inward I’m a coward. I hate risks and any sign of difficulty. I feel suffering everyday and sometimes it becomes physical pain. I’m not complaining. I’m just saying what happens to me. I’m asocial and an introvert, but I’m am very different outwardly. My outwardly self use to reflect my inwardly self. I made a choice and stuck to it. I made myself change. No matter how much you change. You’re still the same.

So yes maybe fear is kept alive by us both, but remember we birthed something more than fear. That more is every reason to press forward nonstop.

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Hey AVJR,

First off – was so good to see you, even for a moment, at Warped this summer…that was awesome.

Second, you’re not crazy or weak for being afraid. The people you deem as most courageous and noble actually experience a ton of the same fear. They just make a choice in the moment to lean into the fear, which is actually something you’ve done quite well throughout your journey with HeartSupport, and is something you’ve got a good deal of practice with. I don’t think you’re as far away from the mark as you think you are – your life just looks different than these other “heroes”, right, who only have the bits of their stories that are heroic displayed for you…you don’t see all the daily anxieties and fears that they have, and so there really is no comparison. I think in YOUR journey, you’ve been consistently taking steps towards bettering your life even amidst tons of discouragement, and I think that’s courageous.

I don’t think you have to do all that much different than what you’ve already been doing this whole time – it’s just taking the next courageous step…it’s not a big life change or whatever, it’s just the next right thing…so what would be courageous for your life right now, towards the healing of your heart and towards the progress of your recovery?

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@NateTriesAgain @MentallyillGamer @StHaTaDi-Ethan

Thank you guys for replying my post. It means a lot to me.

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i don’t have much to add to what’s already been said. but remember courage is not absence of fear, is acting despite the fear.

you have that thing in you that allows you to inspire courage in others. not managing to follow your own advice there doesn’t make you a hypocrite. i can’t help but imagine you developed this ability partly (mostly? entirely?) from all the times you tried, successfully or not, to encourage yourself.

i wanna tell you that i want you to keep growing it. to keep encouraging people, even if you feel like you can’t encourage yourself enough. it’ll get stronger as you do it, and i hope one day it gets strong enough to yell louder than your fears can.

keep pushing! we’re with you!

and btw, if your god’s the same as mine, god will always have a place for you.

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@maxstardust Thank you.