There's a rift between me and my close friend

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So, I’ve been having issues with my close recently. She’s a wonderful person, and an amazing woman of God. She even interns for this amazing Christian non-profit, and I couldn’t be any more proud of who she has become. But, lately things have been tense.

We had a really bad falling out recently. I was having a bit of a mental breakdown, because of my mental health, serious health conditions, and other things that have been weighing on me (not that it’s an excuse, by any means), and I overreacted to something she had said, and we had a bit of an argument. I apologized after the fact, and tried to mend things, even gave her a few days of space. I texted her yesterday, because I wanted to say that I’m sorry again, and even try to encourage her a little bit. Didn’t hear from her, which is fine. I texted her once more today, just to say that I respect her wanting space from me, because I know with my mental health, I can be a little difficult from time to time, like many people who struggle with similar things. So I did just that. I told her I respect her wanting space, and reiterated that she mean a lot to me, and that I was so proud of her for her work with her non-profit, and also as an artist (she’s a wonderful photographer). She finally responded saying that I come off as clingy and dependent on her, which I am most definitely not.

I realize this probably sounds like a silly thing to rant/ post about, but to be honest, this really hurt me. By NO means am I saying I’m blameless or perfect. Obviously, like I said, I said some things I shouldn’t have in the past, and tended to overreact to things. But, I really do try to better myself every day, and to be more compassionate and selfless, and to be a good example of Christ.

But yeah, idk. It just hurt. I explained to her that I only depend on God and myself, but that I appreciated her dearly, and even offered some words of encouragement (because she had stated lately that she was feeling lonely, and everyone needs some uplifting words from time to time), but she didn’t seem to care, and only accused me of being ‘clingy’ and too much.

Obviously, I will continue to give her space and not reach out to her anymore, because I don’t want to come off as she is describing.

Anyways, sorry for the rant. I care about her very dearly and would like things to be okay between us, but I suppose if it’s God’s will that we’ll be friends, it’ll work out. Any kind of encouragement or advice if appreciated.

Thank you and God bless HS family.

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@justaguy

People make mistakes. Your friend calling you clingy is a mistake. When someone is hurt, they are going to say things they don’t mean. Later on, they will regret it. I encourage you to pray for her. She is focusing on her hurt. She should focus on God, and to forgive you. I’m glad you have a female friend who loves Jesus. Christian man like ourselves need sisters in Christ. Not only them, but also the Church. You will get through this, my brother. I hope you are having a restful evening. Thank you for sharing. God bless. Stay strong.

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Thank you. I appreciate that. I have been praying for her, pretty much nonstop. I appreciate the encouragement! I will stay strong.

God bless

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Hey friend,

I think it’s very mature of you to give her the space that she needs while also making sure she knows that she means a lot to you. It sounds like at this point in the situation, she just needs to figure out where she’s at. She might come around and want to talk in a couple days, or it could be a couple weeks (I don’t know her so I don’t know how she typically handles situations like this). But if she truly views you as dependent on her, then this hiatus in your friendship could be a great way to prove to her that that’s not true. I know it’s hard for you, but it will be okay; you are not defined by your mental health issues, you are defined as who God created you to be. Focus on being that person and things will imminently look up.
This is not silly.
You are not clingy.
You are not too much.
You’re doing great.

Hang in there friend,
Jaden

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@justaguy, Friends can be complicated, I was friends with someone in high school and now I can’t stand her since she sided with one of my abusers, someone who cannot understand that some people struggle with mental illness though it does hurt especially when they take their own path, don’t understand that we may come off as “clingy” to some but anyone who has ever been in the situation of battling mental illness knows what comes along with that diagnosis. I’m sorry this is happening to you and I hope she comes around, but it may take a while. I had that happen a couple times where I lost friends because they didn’t understand what I was dealing with a few came back and we’re still friends to this day but a few did not, it’s all about how said friend handles the situation in the end. Just know that all of us here will be there for you no matter what and if you ever need anyone to talk to just send me a message and we can talk.