Things are getting a bit better with my parents

During the summer the relationship between my parents have definitely gotten better things still happen at moments but overall we are ok with each other. I recently started school and I’m worried that I’ll fall into the same thing I did last year. Stuff like having 10+ missing assignments and not having the motivation to do them, failing classes, having panic attacks, ect. And that might cause me and my parents to start fighting again. I really do appreciate those memories when I truly feel like they care for me and I really don’t want to lose those memories so badly do I wanna keep a relationship like that forever. I wanted to share the happy memory I created with my dad (witch doesn’t normally happen) a couple days ago me and my dad listen and talked about 90s/80s music & sharing laughs. I wish stuff like that happens more but I’m scared it won’t and we will start fighting again. I don’t know how to describe it I’m really worried things can get pretty scary when me and my dad fight. I just want that perfect farther daughter relationship with him but something always goes wrong.

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I truly hope your parents continue to be civil with each other and supportive of you. Just remember that it’s not your fault if they’re upset with you, it doesn’t mean you’re a bad person despite it feeling like that. Keep updating about this, I want to hear about it. Love you.

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Hi Jay
Thank you for posting, I can certainly understand your fears regarding history repeating itself this year, its always a worry when you have had a bad time that the same this will happen again but hindsight is a great thing to have and this year you have some knowledge to use to help make some changes and you have already started to do that which is great and lessens the chance of it happening again.
I am glad you have managed to have some good moments with your Dad, its lovely to have those times to hold on to as you get older, have you ever spoken to your parents about your fears or about wanting to spend more quality time with them? you may find your Dad would enjoy that too, a chance to relax with his daughter away from the stress of other day to day activities that wear us down.
Spend time if you can, laugh more together and talk. My dad and I have spent so many hours talking over the years, we certainly do not have a perfect relationship by any means but we learned that we are very much alike and we are close and I would love that for you too.
I wish you all the very best with many happy memory making moments in your future.
Much Love
Lisa :heart:

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Hey @Jay,

Thank you so much for taking the time to share this. It is so precious, but also so important to reflect on the things that are doing well in our life, so we can embrace them fully.

It’s so heartwarming to hear that your relationship with your parents has been better lately. However, I hear those fears that you have. The concerns about the future and that things might be wrong again. It is valid, understandable, and I think it is not uncommon to feel that way when something good is happening in our life but we’re not used to it. It feels good, so we are scared to lose it. Somehow, anticipating this potential loss is a way for our mind to find some peace and control. The unfortunate part is that it shifts our focus away from the goodness we deserve to embrace in the present moment.

School might be difficult again in the future, but you are aware of it, and you can plan a strategy to make sure that you wouldn’t end up overwhelmed as you were last year. Planning some personal organization for example. Seeking tools that might help you and scheduling some habits to support yourself through this new season that’s about to start in your life. From your past experience, you’ve learned something too - about school, about yourself, about your relationships, about how to address the sometimes insane amount of commitments that school requires. You are not doomed to live the same pattern again and again. You are still in control. You can still make the difference you need in your life.

In the meantime, friend, allow yourself to embrace the goodness that is present in your life right now, just like you did by taking the time to write this down and acknowledge it. You deserve all of it. You are loved dearly. :hrtlegolove:

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