Third wheel

I am in a friend group of 3 some months now. At first everything was fine and we had fun all together. But the last weeks something has changed. The two other girls seem to be closer than they are with me. For example every time I say something for fun they took it personally and rapidly defend each other. Also they rarely agree with me and they act like they don’t care about my opinion because it’s dumb. I’m used to be a third wheel but this time it’s more harder because I have a lot of problems (with the boy I like, exams ect) and I really lose my mind. Does anyone here have an idea of what should I do?


Apparently in every friend group you’re supposed to have two main friends and 1 left out but thats messed up you just have to talk to them tell them how you feel

Hi Friend
I am sorry you are feeling this way, its very unpleasant to feel left out like that.
As Victoria7 has said to be honest with you the best way is to have an open and honest conversation with them, just something chilled nothing accusatory or the chances are they might just go back to defending eachother again, try to keep it cool buy let them know its not a joke and that your feelings are getting hurt. I am sure if they are your friends it will upset them to know they have upset you and some changes can be made to make things better.
I hope all goes well for you. Lisa. x

You’re not alone. My friend group also had the same problem, it’ll be three of us hanging out but it’s really not the same because it’s obvious that they talk and think shit about me behind my back. After a while I talked to them about it (I mean more like a joke about how they just became two best friends) and they became all defensive and pretended I was just being delusional. Left them and found a different group of friends that I’m actually myself around. Maybe you should try and talk to your friends. Hope I made somewhat of sense.

Hey slayyy, thank you so much for sharing about this. It sounds like in this group, the other girls have started to be closer, which may be at your own expense. It isn’t rare that in groups of three the dynamic within evolves in such a way that two friends grow closer than the three as a group. However, that doesn’t make it right, and you certainly shouldn’t have to suffer from this impression of being the third wheel. The way they behave and react in what you say almost gives this impression of a “them vs you”, and that can end up being very unhealthy and toxic for you. It’s this kind of context in which we start questioning everything we say, or do, and eventually our own worth… which shouldn’t happen. You absolutely deserve friendships in which you are fully respected, valued, and feel nurtured by it – not the opposite.

Do you feel like it would be possible to talk to them about how you feel, more openly? Or is it a situation in which you would rather see yourself stepping away and trying to get new friends? There is no right or wrong answer by the way. I don’t know the full nature of your relationships and how much you may trust one another, so asking these questions to see with you what could be your options from there. :heart:

In any case, you matter so very much and you haven’t done anything wrong. If these friends are mature enough, they should be able to hear how you feel about their behavior, and to correct it. If they don’t or seem to be combattive, or in denial, they you certainly deserve better friends. You are loved and cared for, no matter what. :heart: