At work I have a friend I go to lunch with and I have done CrossFit with out of work also. So I thought he was a friend. This guy’s reputation isn’t the best at work. He is 6 foot 4 and really intimidating. Most people are only cool with him because he is intimidating. Behind his back they say he is a idiot. But he definitely has some friends that do like him . This guy gossips alot and He likes to put up pictures on his desk about certain people that mad him mad or have screwed him over in some way. These pictures really get to these people but they are to intimidated to tell him to take them down. Now to my story. We recently went to lunch with a bunch of guys from work. I was at another table down from him. We order food. The food he tried to order ended having something’s he was allergic to so he could not have it. He wanted the special of the day witch me and the guy at my table ordered the last 2. The waitress yelled over at me and asked if I would let him have what I was ordering. It was loud and I didn’t really understand what she said. I thought she was asking if I wanted something else so I said no not knowing he wanted to switch me meals. The guy across from me herd her and said he would switch him. So he did get what he wanted but he was pissed at me because he thought I said no. I told him it was a miss understanding but he said he didn’t wanna here it. Back at work he told everyone about it. I had everyone asking me why wouldnt i just switch him? I guess in a joking way. A week went by and he didn’t talk to me. Wouldn’t even look at me. Constantly telling people about the situation and saying he hates people like me and he will write anybody of like they are dead to him.(because he is so intimidating lol) . I even went up to him and said I was sorry again. I explained that I was confused and I was a real friend to him and wanted to go to the gym again but he still kept on ignoring me. One of our mutual friends another department text me when I was at home with my dam kids asking why I wouldnt give him the meal and that our friend hates me. This is getting annoying and going to far. I was so nice to this guy . Drove him to lunch and went to the gym whenever he wanted. Its so akward at work having someone ignore you and hate you over something stupid. This is getting to me bad. What should I do?
It honestly sounds like you have done all that you can. You have apologized and explained the misunderstanding multiple times. As hard as it is, there doesn’t seem like much else you can do. If he doesn’t want to hear and accept your apology then that is on him not you.
That’s tough that the rest of your work has seemed to get on your case as well. Unfortunately, it sounds like it might be something that has to be ridden out. I don’t have any ideas of what you could do now or could’ve done differently, it sounds like you handled it very appropriately.
What I am going to say it is going to sound harsh, but stop talking to him. You don’t deserve that type of treatment. If he wants to let his ego and pride get to him, fine. He is not your problem. If he was a real friend to you, he should accept your apology, and move on. I know what I say sounds rough, but it is what you need. Workers come and go. He will be gone soon. Focus on doing a good job, and treat others with respect and kindness. Thank you for sharing. I’m sorry this happened to you. I hope you will feel better. Take care.