Time and mortality

Last night I got woken up being reminded about my mortality. Before I went to bed I was thinking about two people I knew who passed away at 16 and 17 respectively. This probably caused me to think about my mortality in my dream state which I was woken up thinking about.
When I had formally woke up, the news of Kyle’s death had just broke. He was only 7 years older than me. Which is driving my existential crisis. I do not know how long I have left on this earth. I do not know if I will ever be able to accomplish what I want. I am young but I realize that I could die any minute from now. I am not prepared for the afterlife, there is still so much here I want to see. I do not know if I will live to 80 or die next week. I have no clue when I will meet my maker. This is stressing me out. I am worried that I am wasting time by sleeping when things could be getting done at that time. I mean I already wasted 18,500 hours sleeping. That’s a lot of wasted hours that could have been spent doing other things. I already wasted a lot of time in class. I don’t understand how I could waste anymore time. Time is fleeting and I don’t know what else to do. But, these thoughts about how some people die when they’re “young” is haunting me. Like how is 14 middle aged for some people but you don’t know if you are one of them.
I guess what I am saying is I obviously won’t travel the world anytime soon, I probably won’t find success in my work anytime soon. It feels like my life is just passing by while my hourglass is running out. I can’t control the future. I am not allowed to know whether I die at 28 or not. My life is at the mercy of time and it upsets me that I have to put my life in the hands of an invisible being. This being will decide when I die not me. I don’t want this being to get the idea that I deserve to die at what society defines as young like he did.

Hi there martianTGI! (^▽^)

Time and mortality stress me out and can send me into an anxiety/existential crisis spiral at times too. I’m a person that likes to be in control so sometimes thinking about this stuff can send me into a panicking tail spin! LOL

It’s definitely very scary not knowing when you’re going to die. But can you also imagine how stressful it would be if you did know? You’d keep marking the calendar and dreading the day as it drew closer and closer.
You’d be wrought with guilt knowing that you may not be able to do x, y, or z because you simply don’t have enough time or opportunities to accomplish all that you want to do. ( 〇□〇)

For me, I believe in God and there are days where it’s scary for me to put my faith and trust in Him. I’m at His mercy when it comes to everything in my life. And when it comes time for me to go. But I try to remember that all living things are at His mercy and that He’s a loving and gracious God.

You are definitely not wasting time by sleeping!
Sleep is so crucial and necessary to live life. Sleep allows your body to recharge it’s batteries, and your brain to try and process things.
Without sleep, your body will start to shut down.
Without sleep, you would be similar to a phone with 0% battery life.
All living creatures need sleep - including flies who have a lifespan of 28 days.

Seeing others pass away at young ages can be traumatising.
Their deaths also serve as a reminder that life is fleeting, but that it’s also so so precious.

There are some things in life that may feel like time wasters we have to do whether we like it or not (going to school, going to work, sleeping, commuting).
But with the free time we do have we can use it to do things that bring us joy and fulfilment.

We may not be able to accomplish all the goals that we want to achieve in this world, but we can still take some time in our day-to-day lives to get one step closer to each of them.
We can also use it to help share love and kindness with others we encounter each day!

Time is, sadly, out of our hands and control. But time is also such a beautiful and wondrous beast when you look into it from a magical, astrophysical perspective:

  • How time is relative to each of us.
  • How time is different on other planets or even in black holes!
  • Is it possible to bend and manipulate space and time???

And luckily, we each have some choice with what we do with the time we’re given!
Keep embracing each day as best as you can.
We may not know the future or when our time is up, but we can still make choices here and now in the moment we’ve been given.

Anyway, I hope something in my ramblings could help bring you some sort of comfort!
Time and mortality are definitely things that can bring on the stress. :broken_heart:


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It can be hard to not be able to see the future. We as humans want to be able to plan and prepare for things. We want to know that we’ll be able to live out our hopes and dreams. As mere mortal beings, it can be hard to wrestle with the fact that we can’t control the future or, like you said, how long we have on this planet.

What can be helpful is to remember that your life is in God’s hands. You are living on His time and His purpose. By being mindful of how He is in control, and ultimately has good plans for you, and that by submitting to Him you can bring Him glory (and seeing this come to pass can be astoundingly beautiful, I’ve found), this can help ease the burden of the uncertainty of the future.

I’m not sure if this helps or not. But it is what helps me.

If it makes you feel any better, everyone wrestles with these kinds of thoughts you are having, at one time or another. We aren’t in control, so to live for the One who is (God) can bring purpose and meaning to life. Especially when we have no idea what the future holds.

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Hey friend, just wanted to first say it’s totally a normal thing to wrestle with these thoughts. I feel like I’ve heard a quote that goes along the lines of us being finite beings with infinite souls. The unknown of it all is pretty scary when you dwell on it. The thing is, none of us get to know when our time is up. Really, all we can do is enjoy what we’ve been given and try to do our best with it. If it’s making you happy, it’s probably worth doing. Just try to do your best friend. That’s all we really can do. Search for what gives you meaning. Don’t stop until you find it. And then keep finding it. Yeah, we’re all gonna be wasting some of our time. It’s inevitable really. Not every tedious thing required to maintain the meat suit we walk around in has some profound and infinite purpose. You gotta sleep, eat, etc so that your body keeps working! And hey, is sleep really worthless? It makes you feel better right? And dreams are pretty cool too, our brains making up crazy things while our body is restoring itself… Not everything we do is gonna be the stuff that matters in the end, but we still have to do it.

So maybe you’re gonna live to be 100. Maybe you’ll go when you’re 65. Maybe it’s tragically going to be younger than that. (I hope it’s not). But you’re never gonna get a countdown clock to know. All any of us can do is just live and hope that it’s worth it in the end. I get that facing down your own mortality can make you feel pretty powerless. But the thing is, you actually have a lot of power here. Your power is to make your life, however long it is, into something you can look back on and be proud of; something that lives on after you’re gone. Think of Kyle- I guarantee he’s made a lasting impression in his tragically short time. I know he’s made an impression on my life, and I’m never going to forget him. And I’m sure your friends made an impression on you too- you haven’t forgotten them. They live on in your memories and in those who knew them. Hold on to that, and keep trying to do the things with your life that will live on.

Wrestle with mortality. Wrestle with your own existence. Get existential. But then use it to fuel you into becoming better. Grow, learn, make a difference. Be happy. And LIVE. Live the crap out of your life, in whatever ways that work for you. You don’t need to travel the world or be the greatest in some career. Just do you. Find what makes time seem not wasted for you.

Hope that this helps in any way. I’ll quit my rant now :slight_smile:

Hey Martian,

I understand this feeling to an extent. It’s hard not knowing when we will be gone- it really is.

I think a big thing is just focusing on what you love- what you want to achieve.

I really know how hard Kyle’s death has been- it has hit me really hard too.

I’m proud of you for being open and posting- I know it can be hard.

I believe in you. Hold fast.

With love,
Lyss (ur old pal Blurryface)