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Belongs to: Therapist Cry's While Listening to Wings of Maria Pt 1 and 2 by Tool
Today is day 4.645 days since I fell 2-1/2 stories to concrete and only broke my T-12 it imploded and left my spinal cord shredded and me paraplegic. My daughter was 11 and my son was 6 years old. They were both there when it happened. My daughter realized the seriousness has suffered survivors guilt sense February 4, 2025. It will be exactly 13 years. I recently found out Iām having my second granddaughter due February 4 itās a chance for me to reframe that date in my mind. My son has been obsessed with tool for a very very long time talks about 46 and two the fact that itās expected that we will gain two chromosomes. Heās obsessed with the Fibonacci sequence built, computers build he builds everything at 17 he was certified as a pipe and pressure vessel welder, his creative in his mind and with his hands, he says very few works, but when he says something, itās always worth listening to and really profound. They are both aware that I full coded twice once in the life flight and once at the shop unit, I was in a coma I was lucid and they didnāt know it, but I heard the doctors talking about. I was deteriorating so I got here both of my kids, tell me their final goodbye and Iāve lived with that ever since. My daughters goodbye was very apologetic. I could tell she had guilt. Then, my son his guy was more of a pleading that I donāt leave but if I had to go then I should go. The medical staff had pretty much determined that everything was shutting down my liver, my kidneys. My brain activity was slowing so they had come to conclusion. My father was the only one who said no heās not gonna die. I heard him say that to the doctor and charge nurse. The doctor told him to try to make peace with it. My dad told the doctor, āheās not gonna die because heavenās not ready for him in the hell is afraid of a hostile takeover!!ā The last five years, my body has been failing. My health has been getting worse and worse said short-term goals right now. My only goal is to see my granddaughter Born when I see that and I will set a new goal.But 10,000 days is too far away I will run out of goals before then. I went back to work 11 months after my accident and was able to work for 7 years Until I hurt myself and ended up with a bone infection in my femur that started a downhill slide. Iāve canceled new paraplegics on what they can expect and that they have a new normal to get used to it and work with in the new situation. Since I injured my leg and the surgeries began. Iāve had 20 in the last five years Iāve spent my time mostly in bed except to go to the doctor Even after that the thing Iām ponder the most is how much better my kids life growing up would be had it not been for what happened. I know Maynard is very private and does very few interviews, but I would like to meet him with my son who admires him very greatly. And the two years after my accident, my son grew up from the time he was 80 he spoke like an adult. He listened carefully and was an autodidact (self learner) his level of maturity at 19 amazes me. Iām so proud of both of my kids for being so resilient but I know itās had a great effect on their life. Iāve tried to make a difference, but thereās nothing I can do or say to make up for their childhood.