Today is hard and I am gonna blow

Today is gonna be hard. I think I am gonna tell my parents to fuck off. The have been really getting on my nerves. I have finally made up my mind. I don’t love my mother. No I truly don’t. I don’t care if she cares or doesn’t care about me. I don’t care what she had done or hasn’t done for me. I do not care. I don’t love her and if she wants my love it’s time for her to change not me. If she doesn’t well that’s her problem. I don’t care if she is going to disown me. She might die with her money for all I care. If we really go at it today my parents might throw me out of their flat in Prague and I might become homeless. I feel like I don’t care. I don’t love you mum. You don’t deserve my love.

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Hey @Ashwell,

In an ideal world, relationships between parents and their children would be full of love, acceptance, support and respect. But in reality, many families have to go through times of rupture to eventually build something better. I’m sorry that there is something broken between you and your mom. It is something I deeply relate to, and this moment of being aware of how you feel and feeling the need to express it is a difficult one.

You are in your right to express how you feel about this relationship. If you don’t love her, and if there’s no willingness to build something different - to grow and heal together -, then it’s surely pointless to hold on to it. We don’t have to love our parents, even if that could sound very controversial to many people. Relationships are complex.

I hear your frustration, anger and hurt. As a friend though, I would like to encourage you to not act out of those feelings immediately. Not because it wouldn’t be valid or real - it is, it really is. But because it’s important to not let something like this be turned against you. There’s a time of my life when I was homeless, and I really don’t want that for you nor anyone else. Timing can be really important in order to not sabotage yourself in this situation.

Do you think you could give yourself some time to just have some backup with friends or relatives if needed? To have some plan B. Just so in case of an extreme outcome like your parents throwing you out of this flat, you could have some safety net to rely on.

I hope this doesn’t sound like I’m dismissing you or anything like that. It is ok to set boundaries and be honest about how you feel. I will personally always support you, no matter what your decisions are. I just want to encourage you to make sure that you protect yourself through that process. I hear you. I hear this urge and deep need to express yourself. Please be safe though. :hrtlegolove:

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Hi Micro.
Thank you for your support.The situation defused itself for now. I am going back to Prague tomorrow so hopefully nothing bad happends till then. But you are right. I should really start thinking about a plan B. Thank you for your support :heart:

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Hey Ashwell,

I am so sorry you’re hurting so, so much and for whatever happened that brought up all these painful feelings. It is so incredibly heartbreaking when parents aren’t able to meet their child’s emotional needs and love you the way they are supposed to.

Your last sentence just broke my heart. I don’t have any contact to any relatives. They don’t know where I live, what I do, and don’t have any contact details. I still need this to protect myself, even after several years. I just wanted to share that, in some ways, I understand what this kind of pain feels like.

I agree with Micro to maybe first look for a housing alternative. When you really want to go for this conversation, I can imagine that you might want to get away afterwards and not having to come back for as long as you need to.

I hope you’re doing okay right now. Sending you much love. :hrtlegolove:

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Today I am leaving my parents place. Was close to feeling sorry for what I have written about my mother. She had quickly proven me right again though. So no. I dont love you mum. I hope we dont see each other in a long time.

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Hey Ashwell, I hope you’re doing okay. You’re in my thoughts. What an incredibly rough day and time in your life. Sending you hugs and much love. :hrtlegolove:

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Thank you blini. I appreciate it very much :slightly_smiling_face: I hope you are doing better :heart:

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Hey I hope everything will turn out okay. Idk what your mom has done, but I wish the best for you if you’re leaving that house. I really really hope you have a place to go. If you’re going back to Prague I’m guessing you left and you’re going back? Unless you did change your mind. Are you going to be alright?

Please stay safe, maybe your parents don’t love you but we do.

-X

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Hi friend :slightly_smiling_face:
Thank you for your support. My parents do love me but my mum is a toxic person. Thats the basis of it. Yes I am returning back to Prague with my brother. I am glad i am leaving. My mother is just very toxic, controling and judgemental. Plus she is an alcoholic. So yeah that is the short version. I think I am gonna be alright. Thank you :slightly_smiling_face: I hope you are doing ok but if not you can Always DM me :wink:

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