Hey guys… So, I spend a lot of time in the community, but figured it’s time I step outside my comfort zone and made a post.
There’s a few things that I’m struggling with and I honestly feel stupid even talking about them but here we go.
I grew up in a highly abusive home, and I’m actively trying to escape it, but circumstances are getting more and more intense making it hard. Such as not knowing how much longer I’ll be at my job or where I can even move to. My therapist and I believe that the abuse I receive is why I get so attached to people who show me care so quickly… It’s been a few days since I’ve spoken to any of my friends and honestly none of them have reached out to check on me knowing that I’m in a low place right now which really hurts. I’ve been starting to get suicidal thoughts, I’m harming myself and I’m scared that one small thing is going to push me over the edge but I’m so terrified that if I reach out I’m going to be bothering my friends. I mean, if they haven’t even bothered to message me surely they’re not as invested in the relationship we have so why would they help me?
I can’t turn to my parents because even the mention of emotional struggles turns this place into a war zone. I don’t know what to do anymore, I’m st the end of my rope and suicide is looking more attractive as time goes by
The only contact I’ve really had with someone is them telling me that I won’t possibly be accepted into Heaven and I’m not worthy of Gods love because I’m attracted to girls. What do I do when the only person to talk to me is saying things like that and I’m stuck in a lot of depression working a dead-end job? What do I even have to live for?