UGH! Here I am again…I just need to talk out my feelings.
I am in my current job and wish I slowed down to think things through. I shouldn’t have accepted this job, but hindsight is 20/20. I accepted it because I wanted to figure out what grade I would want to teach while I pursue my teaching certification. I am not supported. I am not encouraged. I wasn’t trained in the things I should have been…and my boss gets mad at me for not doing things the proper way. I honestly want to quit, because it drags me down mentality…but sometimes, doing the right thing isn’t the easiest thing.
My last job was so toxic. This one isn’t much better. I believed when I accepted this job that it would be the beginning of my career in teaching. But, it quickly showed that I want to focus on a different realm of teaching. I truly believe that I am meant to be a teacher, but I think I need to regroup and figure out a new path. At the same time, I don’t want to leave the students that I have connected with or leave the teacher that I help. I am just conflicted and overwhelmed.
That’s so hard! You don’t always know the environment you’re walking into, and it can so easily make you feel like you don’t want to be in that role, but I’m glad you’ve realised you just want to try a different area of teaching!
Have you been able to talk to you boss about these issues that arise?
You know, I find sometimes people who like to have things done their way don’t always see that just because someone is approaching it differently doesn’t mean the outcome is going to be compromised. As the saying goes “there’s more than one way to skin a cat”. But the fact that it’s making you feel like you’re being pushed down isn’t good!
It’s always okay to grow and leave behind places and people, and maybe the impact you’ve had on the students will stay with them! You always remember someone who has been kind and is able to teach you in a way you can understand.
When it comes to finding out what kind of work suits you best, it is usually accomplished through hindsight. The same thing happens when choosing a major in college. That’s why changing majors is so common. It’s also why people change careers several times in a lifetime.
The boss has no reason to get mad unless instructions were clear to begin with. I suspect that it’s more a matter of opinion rather than how well you’re performing.
It’s always sad to part company with those with whom you’ve established a connection, yet I believe they are far better off than they would’ve been if you hadn’t been there. The priority must be finding a position that nurtures you. It’s not good for you, and quite possibly not good for those around you, if your current job continues to wear you down.
You mentioned doing the right thing, and you have both the courage and stamina to choose the most appropriate time to leave your current position. Consider also, others will benefit from your presence, and derive even greater benefit, if you are happy in your job.
Making a plan will help you feel less conflicted. Focusing on the only thing that you can control, which are your actions in the present moment, can help with avoiding feeling overwhelmed.
Make sure you get enough rest and mental relaxation. Allocating some time in which you completely let go of stressful issues, can be very helpful.
Hey @StarFox, its good to see you always my friend. Isnt hindsight a wonderful thing?
I was reading your post and all these thoughts were going through my head and then i was lookng at the replies that you had and it was like “i thougt it, they put it, i thought it they put it” i realise now that I just sound like an Arianna Grande song so my words of wisdom here really are not going to be of any use as you have have had the best from both @ManekiNeko and @Wings so all I am going to say as I really did want to respond to you is that I am so proud of you that you are putting yourself out there to reach the goals that you want to reach in what sounds like a difficult enviroment, I can imagine that its a clicky and difficult place to fit it when you start in different locations and many including myself couldnt do it but clearly your will to get your certification, love of the children you are going to be teaching and you strength and courage is pushing you forward and im bloomin proud as puch for that and I hope you are too?
See if you can talk to these people about the lack of support, if you really dont feel you are going to gain that help then maybe looking at the bigger picture is the anwser. You are Loved esp by me. xxx