Up and downs

Idk I’ve always felt like i would never be enough or just a let down or dead weight to a lot of relationships that i have built with people , i can never seem to make this person satisfied i struggle with doubt mentally I’m drained with emotions i can’t really put everything into thought. I always tend to be there more for people than they are for me

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I understand how it can be so draining to put so much into a relationship and not seem to get anything back in return. Even though there might be some people who just keep on taking, I’m sure there are other people who are wanting to get to know you and be there for you. It might be hard to find, but don’t give up on yourself!

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From: Lisalovesfeathers

Hi Friend Welcome to Heart Support and thank you for your post, I am so sorry that you feel so drained and appear to have such a lack of self-worth. I am so glad you are here because the first thing that you can be told is how amazing you are and that isn’t just something to be said it’s a fact. You are a truly wonderful person and I know that because we all are and you just as deserving as every single person here and you have just become part of a community that will respect and value you as that equal. Is the self-doubt you have the reason you are emotionally drained? I think you hit the nail on the head in your last sentence, maybe its time to spend more time and care on yourself and less on people that aren’t grateful. Please post anytime friend and I will put a couple of links under here about working on your self esteem that you may find helpful. Much Love Lisa. x
How To Build Self-Esteem - The Triple Column Technique (CBT) - YouTube
Self-Esteem Journals, Prompts, PDFs and Ideas (positivepsychology.com)

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From: eloquentpetrichor

Welcome to the community woo22! Thank you for posting and sharing this with us. You do not exist to make others happy or to satisfy them. You exist to make yourself happy. To find self satisfaction. There is nothing wrong with wanting others to be happy or wanting to help them but you are important on your own. You matter, regardless of what others think of you, regardless of how much you are there for other people, you matter. :hrtlegolove:

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From: micronious

You shouldn’t worry friend… the things you do for others are what strengthens you… you just have to know where that love comes from that you give others. Know that this love comes from deep within you… Let that love not only flow out to others, but also to yourself. Once you give yourself that love, you will truly understand what it means to love … May the healing light fill you up and allow you to feel the love you deserve. Then take that and share with the people you help and notice how much better it feels!

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Hi woo22
Welcome to heartsupport, we are glad to have you :slightly_smiling_face:. I think what you are going through is a crisis of self worth and people pleasing. Your are not a deadweight, you never were. Not matter your skills and talents your right to existence should never be questioned. Would you ever evaluate another person and be like: You are not talented enough, pretty enough or smart enough so you dont deserve to exist? I dont think so. Try to stop searching for acceptance and validation from others. They will be abusing the fact that you do. You are not perfect but that is ok, nobody is. Be gentle and patient with yourself like you would be with your best friend :wink:. I will send you a link to a video, maybe you will find it interesting. Alan Watts ~ We Must Learn To Love Ourselves - YouTube

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From: ᏒᎧᏕᎥᏋ

Hi @woo22 I can relate to this in the sense of my need for validation. I look for validation from my friends for pretty much the same reasons. To prove to me that my existence is wanted etc. We have to understand that we are enough tho and our friends love us and want to see us happy without having to “pay” for it. You matter! ~Mystrose

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From: SuchBlue

Hi woo22, welcome to the forum!
It’s good that you’ve come here to post and share your feelings. The person who can make you most proud of yourself is you, and if you try to be friends with someone but they do not contribute to the friendship, they just see you as a place to ask for help and not a real friend where you both help each other. Try to make yourself happy before you make others happy, because unfortunately you’re not always going to get anything back when you give. You can do this :hrtlegolove: :hrtlovefist:

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