sometimes i constantly feel like im in a loophole … i just wanna find a way to be happy but i think this my karma , not being able to be happy … i constantly have to battle depression , trauma and self image… i tried and tried to find HAPPINESS , i don’t open up to people because i don’t wanna be that friend who constantly brings their sadness unto others … when i talk too much i constantly get told to shut up or why am i extra . the thing is i talk too much because i feel like thats the only way i dont shut anyone out but when i get told that i instantly distance myself from the world … people keep reminding me how i gain alot of weight (147) and i feel like i get judge for it because i always wanted to not be so skinny … but hey i’m going to the gym to get back down to size i guess;) … who would of thought i would become so depress for the past years and now… sometimes i just think about the times i try to overdose on pills and i was wondering why i didnt die right away …i constantly let people hurt me so i can feel that affection that i never got as a kid … people think im so mean and rude but tbh i wasn’t always like this and i wish i wasn’t like this at all…
btw thanks for all the kind words from you guys for the past couple months & oh its been 1 yr since i joined this site slight_smile: & im offically a senior in HS #classof22 … just one more yr…