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What Do I Do Now?

I don’t know how to explain this, I just feel so very alone. Its kind of like the feeling of “If I died no one would care”. I feel so lonely. My friends are tired of me being sad and I am too. I just go to school and act happy so no one asks. I guess I’m afraid that if they ask I will answer truthfully. I want to scream and cry for help. I think I am doing that. I just want to be happy. I want to be loved and cared for. There’s this big void in my heart and it aches. The pain hurts so bad. I don’t feel like I’ll ever get out of this. I really just don’t know what to do anymore. Sorry for wasting your time.

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Hello there! It is definitely not a waste of time for you to share what you’re going through. It is a good thing to speak out so that you can receive encouragement in any way possible. You’re not alone, as there are many who feel lonely too at times, myself included.

Have you talked to your friends about the feeling of loneliness? If not them, then is there a counselor you can speak to to help you through the feeling of loneliness? What has helped me a bit is talking about it with someone I can trust and to find ways to keep myself busy or distracted so that I don’t have to feel the entire weight of loneliness.

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I have a lot of people that want to support me but they have kind of given up trying to help. I really just don’t know what to do. Lately, I have been having more panic attacks. Its getting to the point where I have to excuse myself because I’m gasping for air.

Hey @gigichocolates :slight_smile: Thank you for sharing with us. It’s really hard to get it out but it’s so important, I’m really glad you did it

I’m so sorry gigi, I really feel for you… Mental illness can be so isolating. So many people don’t understand, and I count them lucky for that. @micahshima made a really good point - could you reach out to a professional, your parents, or someone at school? I promise these people want to help you, and it’s so much easier not having to go through this alone and they might be able to give you some advice or tools to get through the day

I struggle with social anxiety myself, but I’ve luckily learned a few tricks to make it easier. If you tell me a bit more about it I might be able to tell you what’s worked for me

If you wanna talk more, I’m here :slight_smile:
Stay strong, much love :heart:

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@Rick,
My parents aren’t the most supportive in the world. They aren’t supportive at all. Most of my overwhelming feelings of loneliness comes for being isolated at home. As for professionals, I have a very good therapist but I only see her once a week. I’m just to overwhelmed in life right now. Some school counselors are amazing but some don’t care and for my school, the don’t care one bit. They have to manage 200 kids a piece so I’m just a worthless pin in their giant bulletin board.

Thank you for your support anyways

Hi again @gigichocolates :slight_smile:
I’m really sorry you don’t have all the support you need. It’s not because you don’t deserve it, I promise.

When I feel overwhelmed what helps me most is talking about it. It’s so much easier to deal with something clearly defined. If you want to talk about what’s happening I’m here, maybe it’ll help :heart:

We’ll get through this, and it’ll be so worth it :slight_smile: Stay strong friend

I really can’t stay strong anymore. I appreciate the help but I hate myself so much. I hate everything about myself. I’m ugly and stupid and alone. I have no one to turn to anymore. I’m ready to go but I’m too scared to do it myself.

@gigichocolates, sending so much love :heart: There’s so much in you that deserves to be loved and saved. Nobody naturally learns to hate themselves - those are someone else’s beliefs that have been forced into you. You’re not a failure, you don’t deserve to feel so terrible. Really and truly.

In such a dark place I know it can feel like nobody cares, but I swear that they do. Please, if you ever feel like hurting yourself, let your parents or friends know. I’m not sure where you’re from, but there are numbers you can call to speak to someone who will help you straight away. If you feel like I can even look them up for you - let me know.

I don’t know if this will resonate with you, but one of the things that helped me in my darkest place was doing small things just for myself. Doing anything, no matter how small, just to show myself that it was in my control to make this moment a little bit better. It can feel like there’s no hope but I am living proof that you can bring yourself back from the brink. One moment at a time, we can start to make things better.

From the bottom of my heart, I hope you’ll be okay :heart: We can get through this. If you want to talk, feel free to send me a message or keep posting here. Much love :two_hearts: :

@Rick it is hard to do small things for myself. I am so swamped with homework and I just think it would better to just give up completely. Thanks anyway.

@gigichocolates it sounds like you’re in a really rough spot, I really feel for you :slightly_frowning_face:

I don’t know exactly how you feel, but I promise that many of us on this website have been through a lot of hard times and are making it through okay. You’re not alone, and you’re stronger than you know.

The only thing you need to start making things better is the willingness to try. When I say doing small things for yourself, that can mean minuscule - going on a walk, listening to music you like, watching a video or a tv show just because you want to. Starting small works because it’s easy, and it’s amazing how quickly they can make things better. And it doesn’t matter what it is, it only has to matter to you.

I’m here to help when you’re ready. It really is up to you, and I know you can do it :heart:

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