Casey responds to a user on the forum who wants to look and feel a certain way, but can’t seem to get there. Listen in:
- Our culture is set up to reward certain appearances, and discourage others. Jot down what a “good” appearance might look like, and what a “bad” appearance might look like. Be funny with it - these definitions are absurd anyway!
- Take the time and discover if you’re basing your worth on how society defines “fitness”. If you don’t have a flat stomach, and you’re discouraged by that, ask yourself why? Is it because the people around you say that fit, healthy, or attractive people should have a flat stomach?
In the video, Casey talks about how the user is probably looking at other people and how they look, and then looking at themselves and feeling like they’re not enough. If their worth is based on looking a certain way, but they don’t look like that, they’re not headed to a good place emotionally.
We know we’re in a place we shouldn’t be if we’re feeding unhealthy habits to fulfill and unrealistic purpose for ourselves. For example, the user has resorted to only eating once a day to try and be smaller - we on the outside can say that this is something that is not adding or serving as beneficial in their life. Casey also talks about how, each day when you wake up, you are a certain size. And if what you’re battling is a constant desire to be something else, you’ll never win, because you’re treating “symptoms” instead of the root disease. In this case, the root disease is a feeling of unworthiness.
- What’s something about your appearance that you don’t like? What do you see that irks you?
- If you had a magic wand, and could change that thing about you in an instant, how would your emotional state change? Would you be instantly happy and go on with life?
- Focus in on that feeling (If I just had _____ I would be _____). For example for me personally, I’d say, “If I could lose just 10 more pounds, I would finally be satisfied with how I look”
- Now, focus in on the second _____. What if you could gain that feeling without the first half of your sentence? What if you could feel happiness, worth, value, or satisfaction, without having to conform to someone else’s concept of what these ^ mean?
- Think deeply here: what’s your goal? To do a certain thing, or to feel a certain way? If it’s to feel a certain way, ask yourself - does doing this thing get me to feeling this way?
Be honest with yourself, and write your answers down. We think you’ll find that you can find happiness, joy, and satisfaction first, and from that base you can begin to build real things. What’s better - to fit into the physical mold society created for you, or to be completely free of that mold, and blaze your own path?