Where the fuck is your god now i relate to i have

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“Where the fuck is your God now” I relate to. I have a lot of health issues and PTSD with anxiety and depression. I have five types of arthritis, lupus, fibromyalgia and so much more and people will always say oh well I’ll pray for you and God is looking out for you. I’m 31 by now, what the hell is he preparing me for and why am I suffering for this long for? If prayer really healed everything, I’d be fully healed by now. By the way that little girl is his daughter Willow who saved his life

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Hello - and OMG I can’t imagine what you must go through each day! The mental health hurdles are enough…but adding the physical ailments too must be incredibly difficult!

I want to first state that I fully respect and love anyone who disagrees with me (and seemingly yourself as well) on religion. I think there are many great human beings who have Faith, Religion, etc. in their lives and that’s great!

With that said, I must say that I can SO relate to your feelings here. I don’t want to get into a religious argument with anyone. Rather, I just want to let you know that you’re not alone in feeling this way! I’m a big Tool fan, so this reminds me of a few Tool songs surrounding this exact topic. If you’re not familiar with the story about Maynard’s mom, read a bit and then listen to these songs and you will quickly realize you are not alone in this line of thought.

Tool - Wings For Marie (Parts 1 and 2)
Tool - The Patient
A Perfect Circle - Judith

For me - I don’t get much spiritual/emotional benefit from hoping that God will intervene. So, I often find myself drawn to songs like these, because it sort of helps me feel “happy” in a way. Just knowing that others see and experience the same issues and concerns that I have - it’s weirdly therapeutic.

So to bring this full circle, I won’t be praying for you. However, I’m going to encourage you to take your health into your own hands, be your own advocate, and trust your instincts. Most importantly, be kind to yourself and I wish you the best!

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Hey there!

Thanks for reaching out to Heart Support!

I’m so sorry you’re carrying so much pain. Physically, emotionally, & mentally. My mother is experiencing the same exact issues… & I can completely relate to what you’re saying.
I’ve had this conversation w/ my mom… If praying for her health isn’t working… Why? Where’s the big guy when you need him?
Wish she didn’t need to feel this way.
It’s completely understandable to feel frustrated & question things when you’ve been through so much for so long. People often say “I’ll pray for you” w/ good intentions, but I know it can feel empty when you’re still suffering & searching for answers. Or seeing those around you fall apart… It’s hard to make sense of why life hands some of us so much to bear, especially at such a young age. But there’s so much good around us. It just depends on how you look at it…
You’re not weak for feeling this way regardless.
What’s clear, though, is that despite everything, you’re still here, still pushing through it, even when it feels impossible. That takes a strength most people can’t understand.<3
& about Willow… that’s a reminder of how, even in the darkest places, there can still be light, even if it’s small. I hope you find your “light,” too, whether it’s in people, moments, or whatever keeps you going. In my case, its my family… & even more so my daughter. I’m your age… & am starting to show symptoms of the same issues. Genetics I guess! Or things Ive ignored too long are coming to surface at my age. & I wonder if my daughter was sent to me to provide me the strength I needed.

You deserve relief, & you deserve healing…

Be kind to yourself.

Take care of yourself.<3