Hi, I’m Stephen. 24 from Florida. I have a beautiful wife and a gorgeous baby that are my world. I would give my life for them. They are the center of my universe and I am the strong hold that binds us together, but just like many of you, I’m only human, I have downfalls, hardships, and insecurities. One being Anxiety… A huge factor that has been in my life for quite some time now. At times It feels like an elephant sitting on my chest and I can’t breathe, the not knowing if your good enough for the people around you or if your making the right decisions because you know people depend on you. The not knowing how I’m going to make it financially the next few months. The not knowing of the day your going to die or what happens afterwards, the constant fear of one of your parents dying and how will the family operate afterwards or if I can even keep going once there gone. Failure… With me being only 24 I’ve had over 10 different jobs. I know I have a good work ethic but have absolutely no idea where to go in life career wise. I feel like I’m totally stuck between having to support a family and making a decent wage and following my dreams and being selfish. It’s probably because I was once told by my old man that “dreams don’t pay the bills. Find stability and stay at one place and don’t move unless you have to”. Every time I go to a different job I feel more and more like a failure to my parents and my wife. “You got another job?” It’s to the point where I can’t even look my father in the eyes to talk to him about my job, like he doesn’t care or he’s heard it before. I just want him to say he’s proud of me sometimes. I tell some of this to my wife sometimes and she talks to me without bias but I feel telling all this to her and telling her my inner insecurities makes me feel less of a man and less of a husband. I know I’m supposed to be the strong one and a shoulder to lean on but I would rather suffocate on my own and bottle it in then bring her down with me.

I have more things that I’m going through but that’s for another chapter for another day.

I appreciate the community having time to read this and being able to let my securities out and not be judged. I’m so glad I’ve found this outlet for help. We’re in this together.

Just believe in yourself, like I’m trying to with me.

• Stephen.