I am in this very dark place in life I recently divorced because of an addiction and I have three years sober today but I was to late. I screw every thing up I’m worthless I hate feeling that way that I’m alone and every one sees me as this monster. I just can’t seem to get my life together. I have two children that I screwed up like my father did to me and it’s all my fault. Last night something bad happened to me and I can’t get these images out of my head alll night so I tried hanging myself and I woke up unconscious on the floor after the cord snapped and I fell and smashed my face on a tube TV. I don’t have any friends but one woman and I involved her last night because I needed someone to talk to before I did it but she didn’t answer until after and she has mental issues of her own so this morning she is so screwed up over what I did and now thats on me. But as I laid on that floor unconscious I felt so at peace I saw a little boy running in a field I think and he was so happy I think about it now and that child was meee. I can’t get these images from my head I don’t know what to do anymore
Thank you for posting here. This is a time of great reflection for you. I think we all long for the happiness and innocence of childhood and we forget that it is closer than we think. I’m sorry you are in such a dark place right now but we are here to help you stand up and out of that dark hole you have found yourself in. You are stressing and blaming yourself for something that is in the past. We cannot live in the past, all we can do is learn and grow from it and make better choices in the future. You are not bound to your past, your past self is not who you are now. The person you are now is the person who wants to change, who wants to do better, and who wants to be happy. Hold onto that. Take it as a sign that you are capable of being happy and free. It is important that you talk to people in your life about your insecurities and voice the changes you want to make in yourself. Write down what you want to do better and put it as a goal sheet. You are not on a timer for being a better person, there is no timer clicking down for making changes to your life. What you need to do is just start taking the steps in the right direction. Talk to your doctor about how you are feeling, look into therapy. Grow and become the amazing person you long to be
Stay strong, you got this
Hypothetical I know a 29 year old man that was raped last night and he can’t get the images out of his head and he tried taking his life because of it and now all day he sees it over and over and is so disgusted by it that he can’t take it anymore
How the fuck does that happen to a man
Hey friend,
Thanks so much for sharing what you are struggling with here. It sounds like you have a lot you are trying to work through, but I can tell . you are so strong because you reached out and that takes a lot of strength and courage. You said you are three years sober that’s AMAZING!! You are truly dedicated to healing which is very admirable. I am so glad that your attempt to commit suicide was unsuccessful because we want you to stay here with us and be a part of this community. You can join our discord and meet some people and I can send you resources. Let me know if either of those sound like they would be helpful for you. I know that right now it seems like you will never feel joy again, but you will. I know what it feels like to wish I was dead and I was sure I would never find the joy in life again, but I did and so will you. We love you. Take a few deep breathes, and do something you enjoy maybe that’s journaling, maybe that’s watching TV, maybe that’s going for a walk. We love you.
Hold fast,
Taylor
I’m very sorry that something so traumatic happened. Unfortunately it happens more than we realize because men don’t come forward when things like this happen. If this hypothetical friend has not gone to the police and filed a report, he needs to. I understand that this friend has severe PTSD but he needs to find another hypothetical friend to help him through this. Preferably someone close enough who will be that support and rock without making it all about them and making it worse. I would recommend that this hypothetical friend be admitted to a hospital so that he can decompress and talk to people and be surrounded by people. This is an extremely traumatic event and the only things that can be done is to seek help. I’m sorry that this hypothetical friend went through so much and I really wish I could do more, the world is full of monsters but that doesn’t mean we have to let them win.
Noo way I can’t tell him to do that I just can’t
That’s why I’m came here to talk anonymous
Sometimes we have to be the tough love. Sometimes we have to do things we don’t want to do and things we are scared to do. When someone is hurting, we need to be able to make the choices that they are too scared to make. When someone is scared to do something, we need to have the strength to help them through it. We can’t always be the hero to our friends but we can always me the chaotic force to drive them to do the things they need to when they can’t bring themselves to do it
I agree with confuse in this you should tell. Yet if you still can’t report to the proper authorities then I suggest brood it out & look into professional help. I think a Therapist or someone of similar distinction won’t only provide a safe haven to discuss what happen, but also a place of privacy.
I’m also saying that if what happen isn’t to be out in the open right now, professional help could aid to help get it to the point of what needs to be dealt with gets dealt with if not now hopefully later down the road.
I pray for all light, comfort, hope and positivity be on you my friend.