I’m new here. Not sure what to say. There’s so much to say but I can’t seem to put any of it into words. I feel all these emotions that I don’t what to feel. I feel like I’m a burden to everyone. So tired of this roller coaster of emotions. I just want to be normal with a normal life. It’s so hard trying. I don’t know if any of this makes any sense. I don’t know if anyone will read and respond. I was to be at peace and I don’t know how to get there. I have nothing anymore. All is lost. I’m lost. I want the pain to go away. I’m sorry for everything. I can’t do this anymore. Bye.
@callam1077thank you for reaching out. I’m proud of you. You’re not lost - you’re just in a bad moment. Normal is whatever you make it and the pain will go. You’re worth so much more than ending your story here. You’re not alone and you’re not lost. You found your way here and this is where you start to find your way. We are here and listening when you’ve found the words to express what’s going on. It’s not too late and this doesn’t have to be the end.
Thank you for the kind words. How do you deal with the emotional pain of the most important person in your life? Time will heal all thing but at what length? A month, year, 10 years. It’s exhausting waiting. Going through the daily motion. Feeling numb to everything. One minute I’m angry. The next minute I’m crying. I’ve been at work for over two hours and I can’t focus. I’ve written one email. There’s so much I want to say but I I don’t know how to say it.
First off, I want to welcome you to HeartSupport! I hope that you find a sense of safety and refuge within this community - we genuinely care about you and want to see you better!
I noticed that you said that you feel like a burden. Please remember that feelings aren’t facts. Unless someone has directly told you that you’re a burden, you are not a burden (and even if someone told you, that doesn’t mean that it’s the truth).
It’s completely different for everyone. For some people it might take a month, for some people it might take a year. Have you considered seeing a counselor to talk to about what you’re struggling with? It’s really important to not go through this alone. I’ve seen a counselor and it’s one of the best things I’ve ever done.
You’re strong. Believe that. Please keep reaching out and updating us. We care about you!
Thanks Eric. I have been seeing a counselor but at $30 a visit I can’t see her as much as I would like. I can maybe see her once a week. I don’t know what to do the other days I’m not seeing her. I try to talk to my friends but one doesn’t know how to deal with me when I start crying. I talk to a few other friends but it’s the same conversation every time. I’m beating a dead horse and I just don’t think they want to hear it anymore.
I’m just having a bad day. I’m suppose to be working but I’m so unmotivated. All I can think about and feel is the pain. I just want it to stop.