I feel so lost in life. I’ve gone to counseling in the past for my depression, but I feel like I don’t really need that because I already know the healthy ways to cope. Lately, I’ve been struggling with addiction. I constantly want to drink, but I don’t because I either work or go to college. I smoke weed way more than I usuay do. I used to smoke weed just occasionally, spacing it out for 2 weeks. Now, I smoke my amount within 2-4 days. I’m abusing it and I know I need to get it under control. I just don’t know how. I don’t want to cut it out of my life. I already limit the amount I get, but then I always buy more. I have no self-control. I feel so ashamed of the person I see myself as. I just want to run away from everything. I hate facing my problems. I feel so weak. I feel hopeless. Like what’s the point?
The problem is you’re depressed. Your depression is something that can’t be controlled. It is like the weather and the way the world is right now, it’s atmosphere is smothering. You’re trying to escape. You took something you liked and invested your emotions/moods into it. I understand this perfectly because I’m the same way with food. The best advice I can give is to use something else to invest your moods into. (Example: I use to invest all my time into food when I became upset & depressed. Now I invest it into anime, shows & movies. If it gets too much I go to my music lists or to videogames.)
There are other tools out there, you know them just use them. When you first start it will be hard and you might relapse-just continue to try. Once you become consistent it will become easier to do.
It is all about distraction. That is how I fight wanting to eat so much. I make myself angry and motivated to not stuff my mouth. Instead I stuff my senses with cinema, or hearing or touching. (The keyboard cause I’m playing online games or hitting social media-What di you think I was touching? tsk)
I hope you try this method and it works for you as it has for me.
Catherine,
There is a lot to unpack here but you are NOT weak. We absolutely love you for you.
Here are our thoughts