About My Dilemma... NEED HELP

I’m an avid player of League Of Legends. My ign is RUMBLER J. I’m from the NA server. My big dilemma is losing too much.

There are a few characters that caught my eye that I want to be amazing at. I want to be strong and powerful when I use them. But, my overall win rate in normal, in ranked, and with my main is less than 50%. I’ve been on WAY too many losing streaks, I’ve been outplayed too much, and I keep getting stomped.

I have autism. And, I just can’t stand losing at all. I’ve tried all ways possible; trying to be calm, trying to relax, I tried music, I tried comfort food, I looked through many streams, many guides, I tried training. And I even tried the most cliched way of all… practice.

I’ve tried all these ways, but no matter what I do, I still keep failing and failing and failing. I tend to tilt easily, I have the weakest mental, and if one thing, just one thing that goes wrong around me… I fall apart in an instant.

I’m running out of options. Do I need to keep trying and trying, or because of those never ending losses, should I just flat out… give up trying? If I quit of give up, I might end up being a total failure and a loser.

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LoL is hard game, and if your playing teams most people will be not so good at the game, it takes years to get good at LoL. dont put so much stock on your wlr and maybe try a different game.

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really? I’ve been at this for years, and I still end up failing

Hey JLP,

I know I replied through Discord, but I thought I’d summarize my thoughts again :slight_smile:

The thing to focus on in the post here isn’t exactly League of Legends, but I think it’s more the perspective on losing a game. The purpose of a game is to have fun, and while there is often a winner or a loser in a game, it doesn’t mean anything about who you are in real life.

You seem to tie your performance in League to what kind of person you are, as you said you were worried you’d end up being a “total failure and a loser” if you gave up on the game.

It’s just a video game, and losing in a video game doesn’t mean you’re a loser in real life, nor does it mean you’re a failure. There are many different paths to success in life, and losing in a video game doesn’t close off any of them.

In the end, if you want to stick with it, you’ll have to come to terms with the fact that you’re going to lose. A LOT. It doesn’t mean you’ll never win games, but you need to find a way to healthily cope with losing a game, that doesn’t impact you emotionally.

You’re not a failure or a loser for losing a game. Even if you lost every single one. It doesn’t define who you are, and there’s a lot more to you than just a video game.

Keep yourself calm, and if you start to get upset, shut the game down immediately, and walk away from it for a bit until you feel relaxed again :slight_smile:

Best of luck,

Does this mean I HAVE to accept it? I took a few of online tests about my mental being, and realized that not only am I mentally or psychologically messed up, I’m just messed up… period.


Online tests are nothing. They can’t possibly track all the intricacies of a human being and make any conclusion on mental health whatsoever. I’d highly recommend you get in touch with a professional licensed therapist, and ask them to do any evaluations you want done. Only a trained professional can take everything into account and give you an accurate evaluation.

I wont say you HAVE to accept it, you don’t HAVE to accept anything. But I do think it’s important to realize that life is full of moments where we mess up, or make mistakes. Those don’t make us bad or messed up, it just means there’s something more to learn!

I think it would be healthiest for you to take a step back from the game for some time. Take a week off, play some other games, and at the end, see how you felt about that week. Breaks are a healthy part of learning any skill, especially when you’re emotionally invested in it.

You don’t HAVE to accept anything.

I’m like you in this sense - I’m extremely competitive and to call me a sore loser would be pretty accurate. I get shaky and hot and I get angry when I lose. I do acknowledge that this is a problem though, and over time I try to remind myself that its just a friendly competition and I probably need to stop getting so worked up when I lose.

That being said, I also don’t let losing define me as a person. I know that whether or not I win or lose, it doesn’t change my worth or status, it just means I lost. I think this is where the line is drawn as far as relative normalcy goes. I think it is ok to get upset when you lose but not to the extent that you question yourself as a person.

I wouldn’t give any merit to these tests, they are usually just thrown together by some bored person on the internet. If you’re that worried about being ‘screwed up’ then you should consult a psychologist, not an online quiz.

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A real psychologist or therapist? Even if I would, I just can’t afford it.

They might be cheaper than you think!

Here’s a video by a wonderful streamer, who also happens to be a licensed therapist! He walks through his process for finding a therapist in his area.

Using this I found one that was $20 a session which is VERY affordable IMO. Remember, the cost of care does NOT equal the quality of care. a $20 a session therapist could work better than a $400 a session one.

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