Sorry if this isn’t the place for this but it has been bothering me today. Usually I can kinda ignore people at work that are miserable but I find it hard to do. This guy at work that I’m usually cool with is getting to me. One day he is cool and the next day he is miserable. If he gets a crappy job and I don’t he gets angry and makes comments at me. I just say it ain’t me it’s the boss who passes out the work. He came in late the other day. We have a table we all sit at and take turns putting it back at the end of the day. When he came in late there were no seats for him so he says to me why you get a seat when I haven’t seen you put the table back in a while. I wanted to flip out but I just kept my cool and ignored him. It was so hard not to flip out on this miserable guy yesterday. He got a job he didn’t like and I got a job that was easy and he kept making comments. Anyone have advice. My mouth has made situations worse in the past so I’ve been keeping it shut at this new work place. Should I just let this guy be? Or should I tell him off?
Gosh, relationships with colleagues can be such a burden sometimes… I understand why what they said has been bothering you. And regarding your questions, I’d say: it depends. On the relationship between you and your colleague (were you on good terms before? is it the first time that happened?..), on the context at your workplace (are you the only one having a problem with this person? is your hierarchy generally supportive? is there a lot of stress at your work? rules and roles clearly identified?..). There could be many factors at play.
At my last workplace, we were a small team and had, for several reasons, had to be on self management. Which was really great, except when one of my colleague started to have a toxic behavior, to the point of impacting the motivation of others and the possibility to actually… work. As we were all colleagues, it was quite tricky to raise our voice and assume that some of us had some authority. I tried to talk to this person but I realized they weren’t willing to make any effort and, on the top of that, they were saying one thing to someone, then the opposite to someone else. As all of this happened in a small non-profit organization, and as we were powerless, we had to let our hierarchy know about the situation, even though we’d prefered not to get to that point. Of course, I’m not saying it has to be the same for you. I’m only sharing this to say that the overall context at your workplace matters too, especially when there’s a conflict.
I think that an important thing is to make sure you have some safety nets at your workplace. Whether it’s through the way you behave and react when this person annoys you, or with the help of your colleagues, the presence of human resources, the awareness of your boss or the overall organization at your workplace.
It’s only my opinion, but in this kind of situation I think the first thing to do is to simply try to talk directly to the person. Not in a moment when they might have bothered you, but in a moment when you feel calm, so you can explain what’s bothering you. Generally, having an emotional reaction would only discredit you and what you say, even if what you’re expressing is legitimate.
At least giving a try to honest communication can be great, just because your colleague might be reacting that way because there could have things happening in their private life that is affecting their behavior at work. (Not saying it’s right of course)
Anyway, it’s important to set some boundaries when it’s needed. You have the right to do so and it can be done in a very respectful way. Hopefully they would understand and be willing to change their attitude, for the good of everyone.
If you’d like to, let us know how it goes in times to come.
Hold fast. 
Hey, friend
That’s hard. You know, I know that there can at times be really annoying people at a work place, in classes or in the environments where we have little control over the people we are around. And it sucks, because people like that are so frustrating. I’m not sure what the best course of action is but I definitely would NOT tell him off. Telling him off or cussing him out may make the situation even worse or have the opposite effect you want. Making you look like the jerk instead. Probably not a good idea.
If you were to confront it, maybe the better thing would be to talk to a manager or boss about it. And just go about it level headed and calmly. Don’t go in ranting and negatively. It’s easier to be receiving of people when they are delivering their feelings on a civil level. So maybe think about what you will say and work out a calm way of discussing it and approach a manager or your boss. They may be able to help.
If you do talk to him, the guy giving you issues, be sure that you approach him with a clear head. It’s better to communicate your feelings to him in a calm way and be nice than tell him off. You know? You could express to him that the things he says are hurtful to you and explain why. But be really gentle about it.
I’m not sure what the better option is but a calm level headed approach is always better than telling someone off.
I hope it gets better for you friend.