My anxiety keeps getting worse. I start to panic, when I’m outside, when I walk past people or they walk past me. I feel, like everyone is judging me.
Today, my dad took me and our dog to a park. I absolutely adored that park in the past. There are rarely people there, it’s just beautiful. But, we had to walk pass two girls, maybe around my age, at some point. I almost teared up, because they looked at me. I felt so judged.
My parents know about my anxiety, but sometimes I feel like they don’t take it seriously. I get, that I can’t stay inside all day. But I absolutely don’t feel safe around here anymore. I absolutely hate it here.
Last night was horror too. Someone decided to throw a party right in front of my window, in the middle of the night. The music wasn’t much of a problem(due to my hearing disability I didn’t hear much of it anyways), more the DJ. I didn’t even know, there was a DJ, until he started yelling into the microphone out of nowhere. I was almost asleep, when he did so, so I was terrified to say at least. To me, it sounded like I was wearing headphones, while someone was yelling at me. I couldn’t make out a word, of what had been said. Moments like that terrify me to the max. I nearly started crying and I almost had two panic attacks because of that.
It’s absolutely fine, if they want to party. I get that, no problem. But couldn’t they at least tell us about it? Is that so hard? I could’ve maybe mentally prepared myself, or something.