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Bad Night, Feeling Like Dying

Having one of those rough nights , where i get to lost in my thoughts again and where i feel like i am useless and worthless and don’t deserver to be around. It sucks because with the good days come the bad days , and when those come they come hard. I try everything to make myself feel better and it’s like nothing works , and i just want to curl up in a ball and die.

I just why can’t I be good enough? Why can’t i be normal and not so broken ? Why can’t i have friends that actually care and don’t want to use me? I just want to be myself again, and while i feel like i am getting there nights like this one just set me back ten fold.

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Hey @Aleister!

I feel this. Lately I’ve been feeling super lonely as well. You know how much we love you, but it can be hard to feel that over the internet sometimes. What’s your go to activity that makes you feel like yourself? For example, mine is playing guitar. When I pick up my guitar it’s like the world just fades away. Maybe for you it’s writing or video games. I encourage you to find that thing that reminds you who you are.

Tonight will pass and tomorrow will be a new day. Hang in there because we need you friend. You are important. You are loved. You have a place here.

Hold Fast,
SJ

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@Aleister

I’m sorry you are not in a good place right now. It’s normal what you are feeling. However, don’t let it dictate you. You just need rest. Tomorrow is another day. Mercy is with you. Be grateful you are still alive. I hope you will feel better. Thank you for sharing. God loves you.

You Are Accepted just the way you are.
I feel like I don’t deserve to be around a lot too,
and I also feel like with the good days comes the bad days.
I know how it is when you can’t make yourself feel better, and there is no one else there to make you feel better. With the I can’t make myself feel better, I am struggling a lot right at this very moment. You can make real friends who really care about you. You are you. You seem to know yourself and it makes perfect sense but I can’t explain it.

This is exactly how I feel. You put it just right. I can’t explain it.
You make sense.
If you can be understood, that’s proof your’e not worthless.

Dear @Aleister,

I’m so sorry nights were rough lately. If there’s a time when I feel isolated and broken as well, it’s definitely during night time. It feels like the world has shut down, time gets slower and we’re more prone to face our pain. For what it’s worth, you are not alone friend. I’ve been feeling how you feel lately, like I’m not good enough and only made to be used. My heart goes out to you.

You are you, and you are enough as you are. I know this might sound like a cheesy statement, especially when you’re hurting. But it’s still a truth that goes beyond how we feel, and it’s good to keep it in our heart. I’m sorry you were feeling like your friends don’t care, like you’re broken and not the person you want to be. Know that you are loved for who you are, right here and right now. With all your strength and vulnerability. You don’t have to be perfect. You don’t have to fit into any social standard. Being you, with the heart that is yours, is enough.

You belong. During the good days and the bad ones. You always belong. :hrtlegolove:

Thank you that honestly means alot to me, it really does. I love writing and video games actually, Im having another one of those nights again so i might write tonight. Or watch horror movies which i know sounds weird but , they help calm me down for some reason.

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