Clocks ticking away

Days are long and nights are slow, I must work the hardest I can to survive. Knowing I will be deploying soon really kills me. I feel like God has gradually been pulling those close to me away so that should I be killed it won’t hurt them. I just hope that’s the case. I know that every hour brings me closer. The clocks ticking, and the doors for those to gradually fade from my life are opening. It would be easier to know I will go leaving no pain on those around me, but I fear that isn’t the case. I wish I and my memory could just die alone overseas. And just be another grain of sand on an infinite beach. But until that day I have to train, train to jump and fall 30,000 feet from the sky, and learn to breach and assault urban structures. I sit in my room at night and watch the moonlight fall upon me. I just think about my life and see how much better my status or impression would be if I left this world honorably. If only I could get on with it and be another name lost to the sands of time.

Brother, you are not alone in feeling these things. And you are not alone in your sacrifice. Your decisions may confuse the ones close to you, but they know not the intensity of your feelings to fulfill them. The duty of your instinct is one known to man for millenia, and you are another cornerstone of the anthology. You will not be a nameless soul in the sands of time. You will be a warrior, a hero, a savior, who’s deeds will be marked forever in the annuls of the code of the selflessness. Through your actions, others may experience the liberty to never consider the magnitude of the decisions you must face. I, too, am a warrior, and must come to terms with the ultimatum of my actions. But if not for we few rough men, to brave the demons this world offers, there could never be hope of peace for the mankind we love so dearly. So I hope to give to you the strength and resilience to persevere through all the endeavors you will encounter, knowing you are never alone, and that your fears of isolation will be met only with open arms of love. From another brother in arms, godspeed.

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