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Belongs to: Jake Luhrs and Therapist React to Snuff (Live) Corey Taylor
Definately the "you ran away you’re all the same " hits hard for me … because the ppl I really loved all ran away when I was younger and didn’t fight for relationships - so it’s I’m not good enough I don’t😢 deserve them anyway, so do I think I am expecting more from ppl … so I tend to settle for ok instead of exceptional in relationships.
Thank you for sharing!
It sounds like experiences from your past have made it difficult for you to believe that you deserve beneficial and healthy relationships. Settling for less than ideal seems okay, but you do recognize things could be better. I get the sense that you are feeling consigned to this, either dealing with the loneliness or take whatever you’re given.
Even if people have ran away in your past, you deserve to have people in your life that will be there for you thick and thin. There will be people that can provide the relationships you need and can help you thrive. It might time some time and effort, but I hope you’ll be able to find those people.
If you are struggling to find those people IRL, you can also find friendships here with HeartSupport’s community. We will be here when you need us.
If you ever would like to share more of your experience and/or struggles, please come to our anonymous forum: https://forum.heartsupport.com/
There are always people here to hear you and support you.
Hold Fast.
Thank you for sharing with us and being vulnerable. You matter, and you deserve to live a happy and fulfilling life. Experiencing people neglecting you at a young age is so difficult and a feeling I can really relate to. Everything you said really resonates with me, so I want you to know you are not alone.
The fact that you notice you tend to settle for just “ok” tells me that you know, deep down, that you deserve way more. I know it can be difficult to feel like you deserve more for yourself when, in the past, people have not shown you exceptional care. Something that always helps me is to remember who I am as a person and what I bring to the table. I want to encourage you to try journaling or practicing gratitude by writing every morning. This has really helped me get to know myself and see that I deserve better for myself.
I want you to know that your past does not define you and that you should always expect “exceptional,” because that is what you deserve. If there is anything else you want to share or discuss, please reply in this thread. We are here to support you in any way we can <3
Yes, you hit the nail on the head by describing how this vicious cycle works. You were hurt and felt betrayed by people you looked up to, as they didn’t reflect to you all the love, care and presence you deserved to see in your life. Experiencing this type of hurt is so brutal, and it makes completely sense that, to this day, you’d prefer to lower your expectations of others rather than being disappointed and hurt all over again. It feels like you can’t ask for more or you would lose it anyway, so you accept what you have, even if it is not as loving, caring and nurturing as you deserve and need. This is a very strong way to protect yourself, and it’s understandable to settle for what is okay rather than running after what would feel exceptional. When it comes to relationships, it feels sometimes like the risk is not worth taking anymore, for the pain you’ve been through was too deep already.
You absolutely deserve great rather just good, friend. You deserve to develop and embrace nurturing and supportive relationships, while also healing and finding closure from the wounds that you’ve been carrying for so long. It was not fair to be abandoned, it was not your fault, and it was not the reflection of how worthy and how beautiful you are. You are a unique treasure in this world that people allowed to know should honor and respect - always.
