I just lost my grandfather and Christmas is always difficult as my mental health seems to play up and i get quite depressed. I want to be happy and do Christmas things but often they never get done. Do other people feel like this? I feel guilty for not being happy and appreciative of what i have. Its just hard when depression comes back. Does anyone have any tips on how to feel more happy around Christmas? Im trying to do small activities but yeah… sometimes its just tough. I feel as though im floating and not really here. I dont even know why i feel so low around this time. Its hard to fake being happy around everyone else. Any advice would be appreciated 
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Hey there GrungeGirl. I’ve been in the same boat as you before, and it really sucks. My family lives clear across the country and with my current work I have to work all the major holidays with no family nearby, but I did find a couple of things that made at least my spirits rise.
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reach out to a friend, even one that you haven’t spoken to in a while, and just strike up conversation. Whenever I’m feeling down, I know I can always talk to one of my friends who knows my situation and they’ll just sit there and listen.
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find social events. You would be surprised at what kind of events could be around your area where you can meet new people (and friends!)
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do what makes you happy. If you have a hobby or something that brings you joy, throw yourself into it! Even a simple act of enjoying a good/new novel, no matter how small.
Being alone during the holidays truly sucks, I’m with you there! If you ever need an ear to listen, feel free to reach out and I’ll be here! Take care of and love yourself!
Hey my friend
Firstly, thank you so much for reaching out and speaking up. I think that is always the hardest first step to take when you’re feeling low, especially around the holidays.
You mention struggling with depression but specifically how things get worse around Christmas time. That guilt creeps in because you have a hard time feeling appreciation, I assume because depression just sort of overrides it all.
Im sorry friend. I absolutely understand why you feel that way and I dont blame you. I can absolutely imagine feeling low, head under water, and trying to be thankful that you ever had air to begin with. It’s hard to manage the two.
Far be it for me to give tons of advice, because im not a professional. But i can talk about what helped me a lot. When I was a bit younger, i use to think that mental health was just a mental problem. Like, i could just think differently and it would fix the problems. Sad? Be appreciative of what I have! Feeling sluggish and lethargic? I must just be lazy.
I didnt really know enough to know. When I started to finally read about the body and invest into myself, I learned that some mental illnesses have physical markers. So, for example, the winter time in the United States is so hard because so many people get less Vitamin D due to the tilt of the sun. And Vitamin D is in every cell in our body.
Or, I suspect I have ADHD after years of misdiagnosis. People with ADHD tend to have an issue either creating Dopamine or have issues with dopamine receptors. Dopamine is a chemical responsible for feelings of accomplishment, energy, etc.
So, while therapy was good for me. Finding bodily causes that I can work on also helped. Because I can be given the tools to think differently, be more appreciative, recent my thoughts, curb my anxiety, etc - but that doesnt mean that my body is fully functioning the way it needs.
And to iron that out, ive decided to see a doctor and work on that stuff. It will take time. I need to go to the Dr, then seek diagnosis, then seek medication.
While therapy and reading has done so much for me and has helped me to learn and grow, there are some things I couldnt quite fix on my own.
In terms of feeling like you need to be happy, etc - that’s hard. Feeling disconnected from ones self can be so hard because saying “try being grateful” doesnt work if there is a disconnect.
Im sorry i dont have the most sage advice here. But i hope this helped in one way or another.
Regardless, you arent making this up. And i believe youll be ok my friend.
Hold fast.
Thank you so much for your kind words and advice
Thank you so much for your advice! Really appreciated it