Even though you hurt me I still love you

I miss my mom … I can’t believe I’m actually saying that .me and my mom have had a rough past from physical to mental abuse we’ve been e through it all .it got to the point where I just had to move out …I’ve been away from my mother since November I haven’t seen her in person since then and the last day I saw her we were actually in our front yard fighting…the day I left I thought to myself I’m not gonna miss her I’m glad I’m done with this but for some reason every little thing makes me think of her …I hardly ever think about the bad times the only time I think of it is at night but during the day I miss her I miss getting in her bed and putting my cold feet on her and watching her squirm :slight_smile:️I miss licking my moms cheeks as weird as it sounds yes I used to lick :tongue: my mom and she used to laugh and tell me to go away I even miss the smell of my mother she smelled like yanki candles :candle: hair care products and dove soap :joy::joy: I have no intention of moving back in with her but I do miss her and I love her and I hope in future years we can have a better relationship

It’s perfectly normal to miss your momma!
I went through this for years. My mom was abusive mentally and physically. She was both an addict and alcoholic. I had to leave home very young to get away from her toxicity. And you bet that I missed having “mom” around. I have so many hard times with her that sometimes it’s hard to remember the good things. But there are a few. Up till I moved out when I was 17, my mom would come lay by me at night. It was comforting. Despite our hardships, there were still moments of needing mom nearby. I remember when I was a small child she’d sing me silly songs and act them out. She’d read me stories. I remember her taking me to college with her when I struggled in school and letting me do my school work with her in her class room.

It’s normal to miss someone who birthed and raised you despite the hardships. For me, I tried to forgive her many times and have a relationship just to realize that it just wasn’t healthy. I have no association with my mom. I had to learn that it was okay not to. I had to do what was best for me.

But like you, I still think of her. And sometimes I just miss having a mom to turn to. I feel sad.

So you’re not alone my friend! She’s your mom I’m sure some day you may want to reach out. Just make sure you prepare yourself. And only do what you feel comfortable and safe doing. Don’t force yourself to do anything that is unhealthy. It’s oksy to pull back.

If you ever need a friend. Feel free to message me! I could go on for a long time relating to how you feel. But this is about YOU! And I just want you to know you don’t have to feel these things alone and that your feelings on the matter are so valid! I hope you never believe otherwise.

Hold fast

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Theabkyou :kiss: mwah. Now I don’t feel so alone :upside_down_face:

@Ebonyu thanks for posting friend its okay to miss family when your on your own but the time will come soon to see them .