Back to heartsupport

Feeling like crap, screw self improvement

I decided yesterday to quit music, things at a open mic did not work out. ( I didn’t even get to play). The world just dose not want to hear me play. No matter how hard try, I don’t have the thick skin for it.

It feel like no matter how hard try in music, nobody like it’s. That dough bag from Panera ( from my last) was right, everyone talk shot behind my back saying that my music suck. Everyone in New England metal hated me and look me as a creep. I was different from them.

It suck , because I try to support local bands , but their merch and they think I’m a poser.

My spirt get crush so many time, I can drink all my problems away. I meant to be a loser nothing more, fuck self improve man.

I need not let the music destroy myself worth, no more will let you judge about me bring me down. I know who I am and that who will I be. I need come back to humble person I used to be. I can’t let this scene turn into a toxic person.

7 Likes

That sounds like the opposite of “fuck self-improvement.” I’ve watched you improve a ton. The above statement of yours, is proof that you’re a whole lot improved, even in this past year.

As I said quite a while ago, just do your own thing with music, for your own enjoyment. Trying to assemble a band is a lot like trying to herd cats. Besides, even in the best of bands, take the Beatles for instance, there are artistic differences, that often lead to a great deal of tension.

Play your music for your own fulfillment, even if you do it by yourself. Paint your feelings on a musical canvas of your own design. Don’t abandon a part of yourself that seeks expression in the form of music. Don’t abandon your own peace of mind by trying to involve other people who’s taste isn’t compatible with yours.

It’s good to be humble, but also confident and well grounded. You are in the process of becoming that way.

2 Likes

Making music can be an amazing outlet, i can relate. You can still be your humble self and keep music close to you. When you play it for yourself it sounds good and you get a rush of excitement. It can be so empowering and uplifting. I agree with wings, you should make music for your own enjoyment and fulfillment. Maybe set future goals towards performing, it takes a lot of time and energy it’s easy to get discouraged. Being authentic to yourself and your craft can be something that drives you to keep going and keep trying. You have my support and I would love to hear your music.