Finding Christian Community

(I know not everyone here is a Christian, but I figured I would see if anyone has good advice here anyways)

I’m at a point in my life where I feel like I really need a solid supportive community of other believers. I have non-believing friends but as I grow deeper in my faith, I feel a stronger need to be around like minded people, as my other friends don’t understand my perspective on life. I’m a member of a church, which has a tight-knit community (that I am not fully engaged with due to distance. My apartment, job, and church are in different areas so they are all very separate segments of my life) but as a small church, there aren’t a whole lot of people my age or with my interests. I know there is value to having fellowship with people that are different, but it still makes it hard to fully feel at home.

So I feel like an outsider among my friends and an outsider in my church. I was recently in a relationship and my ex’s church had that sense of community I was looking for. But now that the relationship has come to an end, I feel even more alone because I lost that community and friend group. In addition to wanting to find another relationship with someone who shares my values, I also just want friends who share my beliefs and world view. I’ve checked out some programs in other local churches and it seems like they have groups for young adults (18-25) and older married adults but not the mid to late 20s or early 30s range. I’ve also used dating apps but it seems like so many people have given them up now that the pandemic is (kind of) over, so people don’t want to do everything online anymore. Or at least that’s how it seems in my local area, since all the options are far away.

So long story short, I’m sick of feeling alone and want a sense of community with people who are like me and share my faith. And I’m not sure where to find that. Does anyone have advice on how to meet more people of faith? Does anyone relate to this?

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Hey @slay, first off, welcome to Heartsupport!

I can relate with you. My church is small and far away, and I haven’t really been able to get plugged into the community. Being in my early 30s, the men who reach out to me are closer to 50. I guess that’s what happens when you become a “real” adult :hrtcaseyshrug:

My advice is, if you want to make it a priority, you just have to do it. There’s no way to shortcut it. New things won’t fit in your life, you have to make room for them. If those things don’t exist, like a fellowship of late-20s to early-30s (an overlooked, underserved group), you might take on putting something together. You are not the only quarter-life adult who is looking for community, whether in your church or beyond. Overlooked and underserved people are just looking for someone to reach out to them, someone or something to gather around. Maybe that could begin with you.

I hope you can find community. I think it’s great that you’re seeking to deepen your faith and build ties in the church. That’s something I didn’t do when I was single, simply out of apathy and disinterest, and now I feel like I came late to the party. Good luck!

From: I Am Reclaimer

Hey friend, I can relate to what you’re going through. Seems like you’re in the middle of what was and what you want to happen. I think you’re taking the right steps by researching and reaching outs. I suggest keeping looking for churches/church groups like you are, but also take action on what you find. Until then, you’re going to keep searching without results. The dating site of that…well, It’s a lot easier to meet someone in one of these churches/groups. Additionally, keep going to the church you are a part of because that will also help you to network/meet with people of the same mindset. A friend of similar interest may know someone who would be a potential romantic partner - you never know :slight_smile:

From: Aces MCL36M

Hallos! I’m not devoted to a religon but I know alot of people here are. You did do the right thing reaching out. I dont think it is entirely true that after lockdown alot of people or the majority of the population still uses the internet.

Hi @slay, welcome to HS! I too have a strong faith in Jesus. I understand that need and pull to be more connected into a local church and be able to spend time with other believers. It can be hard to find a local church and feel like you are connected. I’ve found that it took visiting different churches in my area several times to find the one I really belonged in. Taking time to pray over where to visit, checking out a church’s website and online messages can give you help in knowing what their specific beliefs are and what ministries are available. If there are any faith based, not for profit groups in your area, you might meet other believers and perhaps connect in with a church. These are just some of my thoughts based on how I got connected to my local church. If you feel comfortable, please let me know how you make out.

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