Finding people that under stands

Is it just me or is it hard to find people that not just sympathetic but understands it 100%?

were i am i only have one person that comforts me and he only sees me 5/7 times a week at least and that’s the one thing keeping me up but he’s going to high school next year and im only in sixth grade

no one really talk to me at school because i’m just and annoying little kid, but it’s just a mask

i just want some one that understands and support me

6 Likes

I’m a Sophomore in High School, and I do understand what you’re talking about. I have mainly senior friends and they graduate in two months and I also only see them 5/7 times a week, yet I only see them a few times throughout the day and have only one class with the person who keeps me up and moving along the most, it hurts.

i can reassure you, you’re not an annoying little kid, older people are more focused on their self and their lives and most think 6th graders wouldn’t understand the struggles.

you also have to remember that older kids also have their own struggles that they don’t show.

1 Like

Hey @Shiggy15639,

I’m glad there is someone who is there for you and makes such a big difference in your life. It is hard to find people who truly understand, because all our stories are unique and thus different, but what we do share are our emotions and struggles.

How do you know that no one understands? When you write you’re wearing a mask at school, your classmates don’t really know you. They only know the version you’re allowing them to see, but this way it is impossible to find someone who understands because no one knows how you feel. It is so scary to show you as you truly are to others. It is so scary to be vulnerable and to put yourself at risk of being hurt. However, finding true connections with other people requires to be vulnerable.

When your friend is still there for some time you have a backup for now and someone who may even support you making new connections at your school? The first steps can be very small, giving it a try here and there, showing up when there is an opportunity you would normally not take. Building friendships takes time, so it may not change your situation from one day to another, but putting in the effort will pay off eventually.

2 Likes

From: twixremix

hey shiggy! thank you for posting here today, really glad we can all come together to support you through this. are you able to take off that mask and be yourself with that one friend in 8th grade? it would be hard for anyone to understand your true self if you aren’t able to show them that side of you. in my life experience, i can confidently tell you that everyone your age is “annoying” as you say, because we’re all just finding ourselves at that age. lean into this experience, discover more about yourself, and embrace those that treasure your true self. you are so valued, so unique, and so loved, shiggy. you have SO many wonderful adventures, experiences, and lessons to have in the years ahead. you got this, my friend, i believe in you.

love,
twix

3 Likes

From: ᏒᎧᏕᎥᏋ

Hi Shiggy15639 Thank you for posting. I think it’s unrealistic to think people can 100% understand you, but they won’t be able to at all if you don’t take the mask off and be yourself. no one really talk to me at school because i’m just and annoying little kid, but it’s just a mask All you have to do is take the mask off and be yourself and I’m 100% sure that you’ll make some great friends. ~Mystrose

3 Likes

From: Lisalovesfeathers

Hey, good to meet you, thanks for your post, it can be hard to find people to completely understand what anyone else goes through 100% even if you have been in the same situations, we are all very different people however it is nice if we can find people that have had similar experiences and that relate to us so we can talk and have an understanding of what is going on, are we doing similar things etc so I do see what you are looking for there. If you do have things you want to share I would encourage you to talk to your family or of course you are welcome to share anything you want to here with us. Older kids sadly tend to see younger ones as annoying which is a shame because they can actually teach you a great deal so I am sorry that happens. Give them time to get to know the real you (take off that mask if you can) you may find they really like that person who you have been keeping under there. You have friends here now and none of us make judgements on you or anyone else. please stick around. Much Love Lisa x

2 Likes

From: eloquentpetrichor

Hello, Shiggy15639! It can be so difficult to find friends in sixth grade especially if this is the year everyone has come from elementary and is trying to navigate being with so many new people and faces. The best advice I can give you is to be yourself and take off whatever mask you are wearing. You may not find anyone who can understand and support you unless you embrace yourself and let them see the person you are.

When I was your age I also had very few friends who were my age or at school with me. So at school I also didn’t have many people to interact with. I wish I could tell you I found some friends but I only found acquaintances until I got to high school and was able to better interact with more people. That was when I found the ones who would support and understand the person I had become. I wasn’t even the same person in high school that I was in middle school. I had not become who I was meant to be and maybe you haven’t either.

Keep finding yourself and show people who you are and hopefully you will find some people to accept the person you are and the person you become. Good luck out there and enjoy the time with your older friend :hrtlegolove:

4 Likes

From: SuchBlue

Hi Shiggy15639,

I was in the same situation as you right until I went to middle school. I ended up just realising how everyone else was pretty much the annoying kid and that’s the reason why they were all just friends :joy: it sounds stupid but I still feel like it’s true. the worst thing you can possibly do is try to change yourself for others, because that never works out and you’ll end up becoming a worse person overall. Think how you feel like you should think and don’t let anyone change that. If nobody else respects that, so be it, it’s how you were meant to be and that’s what makes you a good person. I’m sure you’ll eventually be able to find people who respect you the more you grow up, but you should never be desperate for that because then you’ll be back to square one.

You can do this :hrtlegolove:

4 Likes

I am also a middle schooler who struggles a lot. I suppose I’m proably also perceived as an annoying little kid because of how I look, dress, act, and talk at school. I have people close to me, but I either don’t have their contact information or if I do, I’m way to afraid to do anything about it.

Since I understand how you feel, I can’t really help you because I’m in a similar situation.

I am sincerely sorry.

Keep Holding On :orange_heart: - Pengyou

2 Likes