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From jurifish: I lost a friend to cancer several years ago and I still think of her often. She was so strong, even in the late stages, and I loved that about her. She was always a better drinker than I was, even after several rounds of chemo, we would go grab a drink from a brewery and she would be onto her third beer by the time I was almost done with my first.
I am a big crybaby and have no idea why she let me walk beside her on that journey, and as hard as it was, I had no regrets about it. Her strength is something I carry with me always. I miss you lots, Katherine!
@jurifish wow it sounds like she was a super special person. someone who was able to have fun even while she was going through something so painful, exhausting and difficult. It makes a lot of sense that you would miss her deeply and it’s okay to cry and grieve!! you lost someone worth crying about. Sending you love as you continue to heal and hoping that you can find ways to continue to infuse your life with the joy she brought to it
It sounds like your friend was a true warrior - her own light and strength can be felt through your words, it’s beautiful. Love the story about the beers - what an unstoppable force there!
Under circumstances such as life-threatening illnesses, being a supportive ally and friend is so life-giving, yet the same time so very painful. It feels as if you are on the passenger side of a car - you can listen, love and guide as you can, but the direction taken and the way to drive is simply not in your control. You can only follow the pace that is given to you, but somehow what an honor that can be. It’s a brutal call for humility, unconditional compassion and love, and it sounds like your friend Katherine was so much of an inspiring force. She has left a mark that no illness, no matter of time or physical distance would ever erase. It’s here, it’s very real, it’s in your heart, your mind, and it will keep existing through you.
It’s incredible how people we love can reveal themselves even more brightly while facing dramatic adversity. It’s tragic, heart-shattering, yet at the same time incredibly inspiring. Reading your comment made me think of how brave my brother was during his last months as well. He faced months of uncertainty, emotional roller-coasters between hope/depression, and was so patient despite what his body was subjecting him too. He kept note of all the nurse’s names so he could say “thank you” once he would be out of the hospital, and he used to constantly make dad jokes to make everyone smile. Even though he is not present anymore, witnessing such determination and resilience, such appetite for life, is something that keeps inspiring me when I feel engulfed in my own struggles and pain. They did not know it at the it me, but on top of who they were, they left us with a legacy of strength and beauty that nothing could ever take away. It’s so very special to know it, to feel it, to have been part of it. There is absolutely no doubt that you carry this strength fierce-fully into your own life, and that is is such a profound way to honor your friend’s memory each and every day. Through the tears and through the good memories, there is a force of life that remains unextinguished. Thank you so much for sharing about her and about you today. About these chapters of life that you shared together, and how significant it is in your own journey.
People like this make me think about who I am and if I’m being the person I know I should be. There is indeed something that wakes people up to what a meaningful life is when they’re faced with eminent death.
All of a suden, trivial things shed away. They enter the playful childlike spirit that we all are intended to exude. They’re reminders for the rest of us that to live life in a way that makes you happy is the goal. to be a good person and walk along side those who need guidence, a light, inspiration.
Your friend obviously left an impact on you…she left a legacy with you, too. What can you learn from her strength? What would be the best way for you to continue to celebrate her spirit? How can you be that light for people?
I’m sorry you lost your friend. It’s never easy when things like this happen. But it’s important to ask these kind of questions. the ones that help us understand grieve in a way that ultimately spreads their light, their flame, to others who need it.