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Belongs to: Therapist Reacts to LEAVE ME ALONE by NF
great video, i’ve related to nate quite a bit, as for one of my doubts. I can say i have two big ones, its contradicting myself like what if i’m doing is wrong and the second one is probably of fear of failure, I think I have that its not quite easy to say i do since i’ve not been to a therapist ever, also i have doubts on whether I have adhd or not but I’m scared to approach my mom on that since I have a feeling she might make fun of me or be like I told you so if I don’t get diagnosed, My mom is super supportive and I know show wouldn’t do something like that but i don’t know where that feeling comes from. I’ve also heard trauma can cause memory loss which I have quite a bit but I have validity issues with trauma since I keep comparing them to other people I don’t know if It is classified as trauma and the way my best friend says you don’t have trauma because I tried to share it with him makes me think that I am exaggerating it, Quite a bit for a comment but no one knows my identity so its fine I guess. I did also have suicidal thoughts on more than one occasion so i guess I really should visit a therapist.
To have so many anxious thoughts and to not know how to deal with this is beyond overwhelming. We find ourselves struggling to discern what is reality, what to do, and in most case when we fear failure, we can’t even bring ourselves to do anything. To not have any peace and to want to just turn our brains off hurts so much, it makes us lose our sense of identity. All we know is something must change but what? How? Can it change? It feels all-consuming
When I was about 15, I remember being diagnosed with depression and I remember telling my mom, crying my eyes out because I felt like a failure. I didn’t think I had any potential in my life and I was ashamed to be diagnosed. She sat with me and treated me gently, something that I didn’t expect. She told me that she also struggled with depression and understood what I going through. I was so shocked in the ways that she loved on me and supported me throughout high school. I don’t think I could’ve done it without her.
I know exactly how the fear of telling your mom can feel, because I lived it. Although it is scary, having someone there for you to listen and make you feel heard when your mind feels so full works wonders. If she supports you, she’ll want nothing more than to love on you and hold your heart through this, because you are so deserving of that love and support.
I feared therapy for much of my life, thinking it would mean something was wrong with me. Truth is, therapy made me realize the the that were right with me and helped me grow into them so that I am the person I am today.
We can’t fix our doubts instantly, but we can fix them. You are not alone my friend. I am here with you and I want you to know that there are people in your life and people out there who love you so much. They want to help you and they will carry some of this weight for you so that it isn’t so crushing. I am right here with you my friend, things will get SO much better, I know it <3