I haven’t always been one to put my happiness first. As a result, I feel like I’m stuck now. I live by myself in Austin and have a decent job in medicine but feel like I dont belong here. Like I don’t fit in. I’m an introvert and this makes it hard for me to meet new people and make friends. I’m not a big city girl. I feel like the only thing that’s holding me here is my daughter (8yrs) who lives with her dad full time.
I’m struggling with so much guilt for wanting to leave. But it’s been all I can think about. All I’ve been working towards.
Besides my daughter, I keep telling myself “it’s only temporary” or “you’ll get there someday”.
But it’s been years now.
The guilt makes me even more closed off to the world. I’m depressed.
Is this what my life is now? Am I being selfish?
I’m so confused and worried about being judged or being a bad mom.
Hi Ash,
welcome to Heart Support and i thank you for reaching out here. This is often a hard step to
take, so be proud of yourself. No one will judge you here, we care for you.
Your struggles are not selfish, everyone has this, feeling stuck, not moving forward.
Help can come in many ways in a situation like that, a therapy is always good or a self help group.
I can relate to that, in some ways. I don’t have a child and living on my own for years now. Being stuck,
only living for my work. nearly zero social activities. Feeling lonely a lot.
My way out started with reaching out to friends and a therapist. Share your toughts and worries, you are not
alone. Do little things, enjoy them and try to see the beauty of your life. Activities with your daughter, find
new hobbies maybe. I hope that this helps a bit and you have a nice day,
feel hugged my friend and
Greetings
Welcome on into the community. I am so happy that you found this amazing place and felt comfortable enough to reach out for help.
First off, I want you to know that you are most definitely NOT a bad mom. I can tell from this post that you are there and active in her life. That is something that you should be incredibly proud of. I would bet that she appreciates you more than she can express and is thankful to have you as her mom.
I truly believe that we are meant to continue to grow. It doesn’t stop when we graduate high school or even college, we need to keep seeking opportunities to learn more than we did the day before. How does it work between you and your daughter’s dad to see her? Is it a scheduled thing or is it based on what works for both of you? Would it help to have a conversation with her dad to see if you could adjust some things for you to see her if you moved? Maybe it would work out that you could move somewhere somewhat close by, so you could still see her and also have some of your own fulfillment. Take it one day at a time. Give yourself some grace. Be kind to yourself. You are doing so much better than you realize. You got this, momma!
You are strong. You are enough. You are valid. You are amazing. You matter!
