From Noah: Hi guys, I need help. Gambled my entire salary that I got a week ago away. I’m supposed to help my mother each month with money for bills. She asked me two days ago if I’ve sent it and I told her yes but in truth I didn’t. Now she told me she will go to the bank today to check if all the bills have been paid. She’ll realize I haven’t sent her the money and we probably won’t be able to pay for all the bills. Thinking bout suicide right now so deeply. I’m done. I cant even think how she’ll react. She will just be angry and disappointed. I cant do that to her.
From Noah: I CANNOT TO THIS PLEASE GOD FORGIVE ME
From ManekiNeko: Oh Noah, that is so hard. Listen, it’s such an addictive thing that happens. Just like any other addiction, gambling can lead to hurt and loss. But, I have a feeling if you are honest with your mother and express the need for help through this (if that is what you feel you need and want right now), that she will be supportive. So do you think you want to talk to a support group or a professional?
I don’t want you to blame yourself and be too hard on yourself. I also would hate for you to hurt yourself without finding the forgiveness and kindness and love people have for you. There is understanding out there and within this community. I have my own addictions, and to think that anyone who loves you would want anything but kindness and love for you would be heartbreaking.
She may be a bit disappointed as an initial reaction. We can’t help those initial feelings, but more than that, the loss of someone she loves is far worse than the loss of money. No amount could ever replace you.
From Noah: WHERE IS MY DEATH========
From Noah: I DONT WANT TO LIVE ANYMORE
Hey, I can imagine it’s scary having faced something like this and to feel like you have to hide it or have to hurt yourself in anyway for it to be better. The truth is, that a mistake is never worth the grief of loss.
A mistake can be forgiven and fixed. There are people who are trained professionals who can support you through struggles with gambling.
This guilt is a nasty fiend. I hope you do think about having and open conversation with your mother. About how you’re struggling and that you are genuinely sorry.
You’re valued more than some late bills
thank you for reaching out. things like that happen, all of us where doing something we have regreted after.
in life, and after moments like that we need to forgive ourselves and apologize to others that we did something that we should not have done. in the end, we can not change that. the past is written. you do know better now.
things you do now, will impact your tomorrow. people forgive, people love and will be there for you when you need them. you are loved, you matter most.
better a late bill, then a far too soon ended life. your mom will have to life with that. the people who love you will life with that for their entire life. you are worth of so much more friend.
Hey Noah, its ok to make mistakes you know even big ones like that. We are all fallible.
The worst thing that can come from a mistake is that you don’t learn anything so talk to your Mum, apologise to her, if needed contact the companies that you should have paid (you dont have give them details) just explain that this week money is tight and you need some grace. Most are pretty good if you let them know. Its scary when we mess up and have to face up to it but nothing you have done is worth your life, its only money.
Saying that if you have got a gambling problem I would also encourage you to get help with that, this is not something you can afford to do again, its not fair on you or your family. I am certain your Mum loves you, you are loved by this community even with mistakes. lets gets them fixed and move forward. You matter friend. Lisa. x
Hey Noah, I wanted to check in on you and see how things are going? Did you talk to your Mum and were you able to make arrangements for you bills? I hope that everything got sorted without too much more upset for you. I have thought about you and wanted you to know that we are still here if you need us. Much Love Lisa. x