Recently, I just came back from Malaysia and my family there are really judgmental. One of my aunts asked me whether I was gay, but I was really uncomfortable to come out so I said no. She didn’t believe me and so she laughed it off and tried to push me into coming out.
The next day, the whole family went out to eat. As we were eating, I wanted to take a portion of the food and when I was reaching for the food with my spoon, I saw my cousin giving me the weird look and whispered something to my dad. I just learned today that he asked my dad why I was acting so girly. Now usually this doesn’t affect me but I’ve already had enough and I’m sick and tired of hearing it.
I don’t get why I can’t just be treated like a normal human being like everyone else. Why can’t I just live my life with out getting judged, laughed at, made fun of or excluded? Sometimes I just wished I wasn’t born gay. I want to be respected and left alone. I’m not a fucking sculpture or some animal in the zoo. Why can’t people just mind their business?
I do think it is wrong for others to not respect people for being who they are, but I also think it is important that you understand that you can not control the people who are judgmental/disrespectful. I think something that becomes very important in trying to do this. Is becoming confident and comfortable in your own self-love, self-image, to the point where it doesn’t matter what people think, or say. Especially people who just don’t get you, and aren’t understanding. Because you get you, and you love who you are. Then eventually finding people who do get you, and will be understanding/empathetic towards who you are. We can’t control what people do/say/think, or how they treat us. We can try to control how much we let other peoples inadequacies and personality flaws effect us as individuals, and then search for those who will treat us right. Do you think that your family would react negatively to you coming out, or do you think they would be accepting towards it? I ask this because it sounds like maybe having to hide it is also just becoming exhausting in itself. Maybe you would find some freedom in coming out?
Regardless I hope you feel better and find some solutions to what you are going though. That you can find people in your life who treat you right for being you. Because you are enough and you do deserve to be treated kindly, while being exactly who you are. <3
That must have been hard for you. Your family should have support instead of being judgmental. Not everyone in this world will support people being gay, that’s reality due to religion and culture. The best thing you can do is to ignore the haters. There are people supporting the LGBTQ+ in a few countries. I remembered last year there were a few Asian countries allow same-sex marriage. The new generation is getting away the old tradition. Let’s hope in the future that Asia won’t mean to those that are homosexual.
I’m also queer too so you aren’t alone in this situation. It took me many years to accept that I’m gay and come out to my Asian family. I thought both of my cousins from my mom & dad side would be judgmental towards me. However, my cousins were happy and support me being gay. I do get a few questions about certain things in which doesn’t bother me. As I grew older, I wouldn’t focus on labels like lesbian, bisexual, and etc. “All that matters for you to love yourself”.
Many of my friends & co-workers don’t know that I’m gay if they ask me. I don’t look gay because I dress normal. Not all people from LGBTQ+ are flamboyant & fashionista. That’s just a stereotype.
I can get you so much help-
I’m trans, and due the country laws (no LGBT at all, or u will be in jail for 6 years) its really hard to me! Im just so afraid to tell my parents that i am trans and aroace, because its still a part of lgbt, and they are against it all. We’re kinda in the same boat, and i know its tough, but i hope you’ll get better, and your family would understand, that it doesnt matter, what sexuality you have, what gender you identify with, you are still a member of the family, and you are still a person, who deserve to love anyone you want! have a nice day/night <3
I’m sorry to hear that you are being treated this way, especially by family. Everyone deserves to be treated with the same love and respect regardless of things like their sexuality. You love who you love and love is love. You should not be made to feel uncomfortable for being who you are. And you also should not be pressured into coming out either.
That said, the way they treat you says a lot more about them and their character than it says about you and I hope that you can find some solace in that. I encourage you to stand proud and strong in who you are and not to let the backwards ideologies of others impact how you see yourself. I hope you feel better and are back in the company of kinder and more open-minded people.
have a nice day/night <3 
