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Belongs to: Therapist want to be Happy. By NF
I burst into tears watching this, as it’s literally how I feel, I know God is convicting me of things I need to change, that part where he raps- I can relate so much. It’s so hard to give God my WHOLE heart and hold nothing back, I’ve been let down, abandoned, emotionally twisted over and over and every time I let those hurtful people back in- I just get hurt again, it’s scary to follow a road you aren’t familiar with, try different ways of doing things. I’ve struggled with depression my whole life, even when I was young.
Even just writing this feels so… exposing.
Thank you for opening up to us about this, friend.
Music has so much power to make us feel seen and understood, it’s true that being for so long surrounded by the cloud that depression brings, it makes us feel weird and out of our comfort zone when we are not under it anymore, like we don’t recognize ourselves, we forgot how is to feel good. Maybe there can be even some guilt. The realization of all the demons and insecurities we have on our back, things we regret that we did or we didn’t do, lost chances, looking into this perspective can burden our heart, but we can learn and for the next time we can do better. It’s important to try.
It is hard to give our heart to God because it’s a fight and the dark side wants our soul too, being trapped in all the temptations that the world has for us. But we can give Him our whole heart if we really want to and are willing to follow Him, even though it will be a long process and we need to give up some worldly things in order to see the way. It won’t be easy, we will have trials and sorrows, but He won’t leave us.
People hurt us, we hurt people, imperfect humans beings, but we can still forgive and love each other, but it’s also important to know if it’s worth it to stay around those people if they keep hurting us.
It’s really brave and I’m proud that you opened up about this. I know it can feel scary and vulnerable to ask for help, but it can be a first step to healing. You are not alone in this.
I hope you will find your peace and may God bless you with what your soul needs. -R